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Aug 2015
Always wearing the tough guy hat
Showing others the tough wall that she has built
Making them believe that nothing and no one can break through
That the wall is made of steel
When in reality it's being put back together with cheap duct tape each night

At nights, she cracks
She can't hold it in anymore
At nights, she is most herself
Broken, but her true self. No masks no putting any shows, just herself

She can't understand what she's feeling and that is killing her
Who are you supposed to understand and know better if not yourself?

She kept finding herself leaning toward wolves and their stories
People fearing the howls not realizing it's a cry for help
Perhaps she could relate
Perhaps both are misunderstood by others and themselves
Not knowing who they are and who they should be
Only knowing comfort under the moonlight

As the silent tears find their way down her cheeks
She sleeps at night with few answers
Only to wake up with more questions that she cannot find the answers to
She keeps waking up more confused than the day before
Making her wonder: "is this all that I am? Is this all that I can be?"
Shaima Al-Marzouqi
Written by
Shaima Al-Marzouqi
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