Sometimes I wonder if I’m your addiction. When you call me drunk and giggling or when you’re still coming up on your high, maybe just reaching the peak. Do you call me because I, too, get you tipsy? Lifted? Does the thought of me scurry across your mind when you hit bliss? Do you need a drag of me to achieve your ultimate high? •❋• You’re my 4 in the morning. My “up all night.” The reason I stay awake counting the stars and my heartbeats. You’re the spots that I see, the shadows that I see, when it’s running on day two and I still haven’t had a wink of sleep. You’re every insomniac’s dream.
I wrote this when I was 17 for the boy who would come back to me every summer.