I stand in shower,
rubbing at my skin trying to rid myself of your touch.
If I could,
I'd shed my skin all together.

It's been years and I can still remember the fear in my heart when I woke up
You took my sleeping as silent consent
Even though I was only 9.

I thought for so long that it was my fault.
I fear every man I meet,
I worry that he'll be just like you.

I still have nights where I worry that
You'll wake me up again.

I feel so used
So worthless,
and you ruined by life.

I stopped caring about my body,
I let others use me,
I let others treat me like trash
Because I felt like I was.

I stopped eating
and started to hurt myself in order to feel.

I still hate my body
and I still remember what places you touched
Where the bruises were.

You Ruined My Life