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Jan 2015
My body won't allow me to feel for you anymore.
Though the warmth of your blanket is comforting-
it's not enough when the cavity in my chest
is empty.
When we're not together it's filled with promise,
and while it's easy to see that I miss you,
I don't miss the absence of my heart
and its presence in your palm.
I loved you too much and it's a problem- I know.
Because it isn't a love you can reciprocate.
So with each day apart, I feel the blood in my veins,
and I try to keep breathing for myself.
And to those grieving with a similar fate,
I know you've heard it before- it's not easy but in time
I'm trying to grow out as far as you did and then some,
for good measure.
I used to feel safe in your arms,
but I feel the cold weather- more when we're together
than when we're apart.
And all of my mittens are worn and my fingers
can only clutch my heart for warmth-
so no I can't leave it at your house anymore
it's no longer the furnace you leave in the corner
while you sit in your blizzard, stoic, unapproachable.
It's not to keep someone new alive.
But I've got this numb skin that needs protection
from the storms you survive.
svdgrl
Written by
svdgrl  NY
(NY)   
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