Anxiety has taught me that the large blue doors at the entrance to the next four years of my life are there to keep me in more than to keep others out That the best way to keep the students with no future away from the students with one is to create advanced classes that will determine whether a college will allow you entrance without a doubt
Anxiety taught me what it's like to hold back tears And how to freak the guy next to you out because he's never had to handle a girl crying and being dependent upon and not being able to provide is one of his greatest fears
Anxiety taught me that "it's not just one quiz it's the rest of your life!" That you must work hard in school and get into college and get a good job and make money and these are the only ways to become someone's wife That seeing your fears of not being good enough becoming true in the eyes of the only one you love and that it feels like your heart has been stabbed at by a knife
Or when you're sick and throwing up but you have a paper due in 3 hours and it's either sleep or finish the paragraph who's sentences will probably end up slurred
Anxiety taught me that time is not your friend That it will not be there when the fate of the rest of your life is hanging on 10 more words to reach the 500 word limit
Anxiety has taught me that no matter how many assignments you complete you’ll never get rid of this weight on your chest That you have to keep working until there's no more time to rest That you can do problems 1-50 in your textbook and it'll teach you the material but not how to take a test That no matter how many hours you study you will not perform your best
Anxiety taught me what it's like to put all of your eggs in one basket. One human shaped basket that isn't always around and won't be awake at 2 in the morning because he has an 8 AM and needs his sleep But when he doesn't have an assignment going to bed early is one of the many promises he cannot keep
Anxiety taught me what a social barrier is A beer covered barrier that reminds you that all he's going to want to do this summer is drink because that's all he's done the last 8 months and you haven't been there And that you don't like the taste of alcohol much and he knows that but he'll still hand you a shot out of nowhere That you can feel yourself getting drunker and drunker and that terrifies you and he knows that but he no longer seems to care
Anxiety is more than being nervous before you ask someone to prom anxiety is more than feeling helpless when your parents don't get along Anxiety is being the hero and failing Anxiety is being afraid of heights and knowing you'll have to fall every single day