even when I try
I cannot deny
poems never lie

a Masters hand wrapped in bandages
sad fans walk slowly in the rain
no death. The frown of the boy turns to a smile
teeth missing. Eyes glistening in the tune of the storm
****** around the stadium fight over raw meat, chained at the neck
naked with shaved heads. Red lipstick and overpowering perfume
They were doomed from the minute they left home
airplanes crash in the distance. Smoke fills up the horizon
a wicked sultan pulls at his chained up prepubescent date
before returning to his bedchamber, a master key in his pocket
the eye sockets of his friends and family have been emptied because of distrust
disgusting behavior only him, his slaves, and the Gods can discuss

She read my journal
My internal thoughts spewed out of her mouth like *****.
Anger. Regret.

I saw him as a book then
And he was easily read
Flipping through his memories, I found tainted history
Tears

Oh, woe is me
this girl, she knows everything.
My incestuous mind
unkind and dark
genuinely written without hesitation

Yet here I stand
Confused, taken aback
Stricken with...
...curiosity, perhaps
Sadness and unknowing
And his eyes apologize while his frown regrets

Perhaps she now feels closer.
There's nothing to hide inside
A relief.
I am disgusted by your actions.

I wonder if he still loves me
He won't take the words back
Ink never erases, and scars remain
And so does my heart
Rooted to my sleeve yet chained to his palm

"I'm sorry", I forget to say
Words so typical end up filling the room
breaking all glass
You made me like this
my words are a byproduct of your insanity
You're sad.
Yes, sad. We are all sad.
You are not entitled to read such things
wretch

I peered into your soul today
Something twisted and half alive
Fault?
A face, my face to place blame
I'll never walk away
Without another war wound
But I'll bleed you dry
Should I question morality? Am I human?
What happened to us?

You seek knowledge, yet cower in its presence
" all loving" I mock the idea
for you despise my words.
My work.
What are they, but a part of me?
Your voice is timid
Your despair, unsettling..
speak

Silence is all I want to hear anymore...

Fall
color
fresh air
breathe in
chapped lips
chilling Fall air
leaves falling cold
reds and yellows fall
fresh air from the window
a chapped kiss as hands grip
hands grip hips as chapped lips kiss
naked hips kiss as clothes slip to the floor
bodies hard against the wall next to the door
tripping, over clothes on the floor, and out the door
laughing  gripping hands, dancing down the hall naked
bare feet on a hardwood floor, chilled naked skin, Fall air
long hair and pale skin, running naked to the shower, laughing
a bathroom door, old and wooden, opened with cold hands
cold hands turn a shower on and wait for warm water
hands wait and press hard against neck and breast
chapped lips bitten by teeth as hands grab hips
warm tongues, warm cold necks with spit
goose bumps spread, cold on legs
tiptoed hot water, laughter
wet feet, wet butts, hot
screaming from heat
laughing screams
naked and wet
so soothing
warmth
Fall

I recognized you  the other day
and now, secondary kisses are the reason that I'm missin you

Bring it all  back
take a step back to day one
back to the days  you'd smile back when I'd say hello
back to the day I didn't feel so lame

Back, way before the weakness
faking my interests to impress you
I knew it was dumb

few things came up in my brain when I'd see you
Man, I'd  be writing things down the night before
few things come up when I’m with you
Man, do I get so dull when I’m feeling nervous

Hypocrisy
I can see  you can be kind of mean
I reek like your attitude
but I think a sweet night is a night  spent with you
and I'd do anything you'd be willing to

maybe I could have everything
maybe we could walk  together
maybe I could hold your hand
maybe I should try

I can tell that
you can tell I've been confused
And I can tell
me tripping up doesn't make you amused

I can do it real cool like you wanna do it
cool hair, an outfit, a tattoo, plus whatever..
and I imagine real soon you'd get used to me

sour taste in my mouth
I'm in temporary isolation
dude, I've been having dreams all about you

fairy tale place
saving up grace  for you now
wow, I can be content living, head in the clouds

but, do I dare say
"we should hangout
yeah, we should do fun things
we could do ANYTHING WE WANT!"
......
"Just kidding girl
I know you're busy girl
don't need to say it girl
actually, I'm busy too."


who am I to say you'd be happy,
and who are you to say that you wouldn't be,

and who are we to say anything about
anything when
we don't know a thing about
anything at all?

did you misunderstand me? I said I'm in love
I can misunderstand things, now and again
Then again, I'm sorry for saying that

I don't even like you.

sorry for saying that too

DARK CIRCLES  under my eyes
weary and TIRED
looks like i got high
in reality ive been ******* with tears in my eyes...
your turn

my turn? my eyes burn as well
The demons of hell have turned my back into furniture
each vertebrae is in pain for heavens sake
My own wake will be replaced by someone more important
and my funeral will be postponed due to rain


comth with your *** sith
its the way of the conservative
so shallow, they may as well be illiterate to human sake
the writing on the walls aching for some pertinence
everyone sees the destruction, the wretched police enforcing it
helpless we die in our filthy wealth
until we learn to save our selves
luxurious items are wicked in the way of souls as prizes
what’s the cost of a couple ***** boys from Africa?
just a sheckle over a diamond why not? im buyin it


****** men, Damning all,
To Satan. To the Demon Ruler
*** siths on tongue and lips
drip after drip on the souls of ancestors
They watch you rule, oh slavers
they watch you drool over riches
to you, these beautiful nymphs
they're doomed to be *******
they follow your lead and become what you want
blame them not
for they are a byproduct of your weakness

Innocent hypocrites, diluted of all culture
vultures infused with stimulants
so stifled we cant concentrate on whats important
high after high
going lower and lower
Now we know the new world order
our graves have been dug
now we shovel the dirt back on ourselves
sleeping better than waking up
this society is an atom bomb
and were all dying from the radiation
noise and light pollution is all we know
where did the stars go?
i need to go find home

"I am going to punch you in the face" he said
burn
wistling sounds
wiped
wiped again
It's not a falicy
It's reality
you walk, you talk, you die
wonka? He was a sadistic ****
I'd drink his **** if  I had it in me
Everlasting gob stoppers. Clod hoppers
Fizzy lifting drinks to poo stink
swallow blood fest
**** out the rest
Sarpinos torpedos
squeeze my labedo chester chito
flaming hot meat he don't eat
so discreat. Now wipe your water on my leg.
is it really midnight.
YEAHHHHH
goodbye