Woke up crying asking yourself why you can’t just be happy
I hate you for the sappy disappointment you let yourself become
Maybe it’s time you changed for the better
Tired of you blaming it on bad weather
Everything wrong in your life is linked back to you
So just ******* get over it already
Don’t say you’re sorry when there’s no change made
Who cares if you’re trying your best
Why can’t you see that I don’t care about behind the scenes
You have no reason to stay when you’re being such a pain

I was left searching
Searching for hope
someone to love me
something to make me love myself
it wasn’t the substances we used on lonely friday nights
it wasn’t the guy that did nothing but whine
it was you and it always has been
Found hope in the way you smile at me with everything in you
found love when you would comfort me on exhausting restless nights
found a reason to smile when i looked at myself and saw the pieces of yourself you’ve embedded in me

Cracked ribs
Heart exposed
Tearing me up thought by thought
Look at the symphony of regret I composed
The flowers that blossomed in my bones
Cared for you in all my time
joy turned to a stomach full of stones
Your voice now weeded in my soul
Screams bouncing through my skull
Fallen with no hope left to climb

i’m tired of this charade
this act we both put on
you can keep saying you care
but if you really do then why do i find myself in the same place day after day
crying on the floor feeling more alone with every second
trying to search for a lifeline
there’s nothing left for me here
i only existed in your world when you needed someone to hurt

Fasting from your love makes me feel home sick
I’m alone and it feels like you should be next to me
Maybe you’ll see I’m the one so I’ll be waiting by the phone hoping you’ll call just knowing you came to take away this heartbreak
I think part of me knows
It knows that this is my forever
I thought it was you but from here on out I’m nothing but pain and tears full of love for the one that got away
My mind tells me it’s fine but my heart stills beats to the rhythm of your voice when you tell me you love me
If I listen to my mind I know I’ll be okay but my heart will be the death of me when your silence ends the rhythm

We are learning to love in this decaying world but I'll try to survive the destruction of everything around us if it means I get to be by your side along the way