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  Oct 2018 nooneknoes
lovelywildflower
i want to walk down the school hallway smoking a cigarette
i want to have shards of glass protruding from my heart
i want ****** knuckles from fighting my demons
i want broken bones to prove the fights i've won
i want you to see the pain you put me in
i'll wear chains around my neck to prove i'm tough
and i won't say one word to you
  Oct 2018 nooneknoes
lovelywildflower
i'll turn my heart into stone
and burn my lungs with cigarette smoke
i'll be tough
i'll perform exorcisms on my thoughts
i'll stand here
bleeding
bruised
but i'll still be breathing
watch me
I'm emotionally detached,
in twenty nine days ninety panic attacks,
I see through your eyes,
straight to your past,
the times that you meant it when you really laughed.
Your crescents hate light,
and descend through the day,
I'm deciding my mind between painful and sane,
dividing a line between not okay and opaque.
I know my life's doubtful,
more mournful than most.
Lost in translation as feeling the least,
a leash on my brain and one sense of release.
I wanna meet sharpness to puncture my breath,
rather than losses I can't reconnect-
All feedback is welcome and appreciated

This poem is about how unattached I am from myself. I hope it makes sense
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