I have a list of words
Hidden away
That I occasionally use.

Effervescent words to fill me up
Evocative and furtive words
To give the illusion
Of gossamer spinning from my mouth
A plethora of opulent words
To form stars and nebulas.

Yet.

With all of these long, surreptitious words
They do not help
My comprehension of
The simple ones

The day lay in silence, the tempo of my heart beats steady at an ease, a life ahead and a story behind, I choose to not feel anything, because I am afraid of feeling everything, and thus I must enter once again into the stream of modern life, regaining purpose and losing it all at once.

Carcinogenic gasps
between photogenic thighs
create esoteric muscle movement
that moves me inside.
Your parents are therapists,
and mine choose not to be alive;
the words they say
don't work for moments we hide.

Jesus Christ before the sunset rust,
if I'm so alive
then why do I lust
absence.

There's a place
where I'd like to drown
every Saturday.
The water's warm
and thick in my lungs
and I'm no longer afraid.

Colliding with epinephrine,
your neck thrusts forward;
you kiss the steering wheel.
"Do you know
how much
you mean to me?"
Your eyes meet mine  
before disappearing in the glass mist.
I love you.

These walls hold what I cannot
Houses full of empty thoughts
He creaks and groans with
The endless nights
Rage through the silent white.
Night terrors now past the screams,
Reminiscent of broken dreams.
Lonely ceilings focused in
These part will not be whole again
The windows scrap against the paint
The walls leak out, the building faint.
He given up on this vain repair
Instead he gave it up to share
Between the trees to start anew,
This time for a right, one that comes to soon.