i have so much in my mind
the words just flooding inside of
me waiting to be drained
why can’t i let them go?

i have so much to give
yet, i’m selfish and keep it to myself

every time i see him
i want to scream and tell him everything
but it’s so difficult
why?

how come when there’s something
that makes me mad, my mind tells me, “it’s better
to stay quiet…”

i don’t want to stay quiet
i want to open up
i want to speak my mind
but it just doesn’t agree with me

maybe it’s my fear that
i’ll be judged and my mind’s
just trying to protect me
it wants me to be safe

but what if there was a person
who my mind finally trusts?
a person that breaks
open the flooding dam of words i’ve built
a person who doesn’t make it so difficult

but is there ever such a person?

that caring look that pierced my soul
made me recall everything you’ve told me

promises
compliments
secrets

but all are lies

you never cared
you never meant it
and you never told me truth

but what made me believe you?

your eyes

your eyes captured my attention immediately
making me a prisoner to your gaze
being caged behind the lashes
and i sunk into that black pit
a ring of blue that besieged it

Oh, how bright they were
shining with the tears that had yet to fall
yet you never showed how you truly felt

i believed the words
that flowed from your mouth
like sweet honey

you convinced me yet confused me
i was an unfortunate player in your game
on a quest to seek the answer that can never be found

oh, how i trusted you
how i let you in with open arms
i thought you were my safety
a home where i’d keep my heart
but now, you no longer keep me imprisoned
i am no longer a player
you are no longer my safety
and i now see past your eyes