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 Apr 2020 natasha
alxndra
all I'd ever hear
is the same old chatter

not a pinch outside this redundant realm
of what is programmed into your cerebellum

how are you even remotely entertained?
by the same plain, tame conversation

day after week after month after year
so young but still I fear

to live a life that has been already
I need more

see I exist solely to reflect all light
no 9-5, no thought of a house-wife

with so many others fulfilling the norm
means a greater space is left to chart the unknown
 Apr 2020 natasha
alxndra
you've let the demons in
but you know that's not
where they really live
give your mind some time
to find a line
for those demons
to go stand behind
because your talent and heart
hold too much to waste
and to allow the hands
of defeat
to cup your face
means you've awarded
the opposition with first place
when actually
you've already won the race
 Apr 2020 natasha
alxndra
not yours
 Apr 2020 natasha
alxndra
you may lead a bear with salmon
but you cannot take him home
do not lay beside a wild thing
and expect to remain warm
you may lead a bear with salmon
but he will never be your own
do not lay beside a wild thing
and expect to call him home
 Jun 2016 natasha
alxndra
I erase you
Over and over
Word after word
Then start again
Unhealthily
With the other end
Of the pencil
The only thing
I know I don't need
Is the only thing
I know I'll never leave
The only thing
I know I need
Is for the pencil
To run out of lead
A masterful One hearing of the Tao
immediately begins to embody it.

An average One hearing of the Tao
half believes it and half doubts it.

A foolish One hearing of the Tao
laughs out loud, and yet
should fools not laugh,
it wouldn't be the Tao!


Thus t'is writ:
The path into the light seems dark,
the path forward seems to go back,
the direct path seems long,
true power seems weak,
true purity seems tarnished,
true steadfastness seems changeable,
true clarity seems obscure,
the greatest seem unsophisticated,
the greatest love seems indifferent,
the greatest wisdom seems childish.

The Tao is nowhere to be found,
yet it nourishes and completes all things.

-
--
---
- - -
Reiterated slightly from Stephen Mitchell's iteration.

Implications abound
from ethics to psychology
and onward to quantum physics,
and every quanta betwixt and beyond!
 Feb 2016 natasha
alxndra
he melodically sings (in)di(difference)stance
in every instant I attempt
to make him listen
while he knowingly stretches
all I have tried not to hope for
wires heat, then bend
& never are the same
again
 Feb 2016 natasha
alxndra
when it comes to the point of not even wanting to consume but suddenly that liquid is a river

there is no escape when each day gains another loss

I want to ****** my heart in hand out the window, allow the force of wind to flow through each chamber and recycle the hurt into fresh air to see me through another day with him

for what

together we've mastered it

he, the artist of acting and
I, the priestess of pretending
 Dec 2015 natasha
alxndra
there it goes, no
where,
we watch it go there, one
footed and half-hearted
a piece we liked
to think we'd never see again.
no, we don't need it, still
narrow minded, trailing
slow, breathing shallow
amphetamines
a substitute for blood
a glimpse appears vaguely, only
to be undone immediately

for all that used
to be leaves me
I turn to go each time
you leave me
still I stand like stone
believe me
 Dec 2015 natasha
alxndra
though you didn't think so
I knew what you meant
about not being able to fake
a friendship
or feeling
a complete lack of connection
in most interactions.
and when it isn't real
there is no desire to try
or pretend to enjoy
the company given.

so much less pressure
weathering it alone.

constant company,
to me anyways,
seems to mean insecurity
or a desperate need for attention
especially that of one
impacting on others negatively.

to reach,
or even begin to know,
your full potential
you must give time to yourself
with yourself
for yourself
and yourself alone.
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