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Megan Hammer Feb 22
I’ve had too much wine in the mountains
The clouds are getting in my eyes
With your chin in your hand, looking at me so
That’s why I get up, take the last sip at our supper
Before the bells begin to toll

Pick me up, carry me to the bed
Some cabin shouldn’t mean so much to me
But I’m in my head about how long it’s been
So long that I start to think about it now
Moving back and forth, lost in thought

I've had too much wine in the mountains
The frantic ramble begins
And now, I'm a mess on the floor

Because there’s a church outside our door
The bells toll and it’s all I can hear
All I see when I look out the window
And I told the priest we’d come back tomorrow
I know what I said, but -

I change my mind about Gibraltar
If we leave tomorrow, could we make it?
I didn’t mean it, I don’t want to wait
I was wrong and that ******* bell and
We’ve got to leave, how many miles is it?

Grabbing the keys -
******* it, how many miles?

But you take me into your arms like a child
Moving back and forth, lost in thought
Smooth my shake and clear the clouds
"This won't go on like this anymore"
“I'll get it squared away”

Some other day in time
I find myself full of wine in the mountains
Wondering what would have happened if I heard the bells sooner.
Somewhere outside Tarragona Spain, July 2017
Megan Hammer Feb 19
In the valley of darkness, I shall not want
Though a hole resides where the heartbeat should be
The vessels still do their work

My lungs decay, black and smoked out
And my organs dry up from strong rums
And the things I hold dear become a desert storm

But I shall not ask for the help of dying trees
Whose fruit, though ripe, would leave me with less leaves
Or perhaps with more than I could bear

No, I stand on the mountains
The mountains we lived in, where the church sits upon the hill
I stand on the mountains and call for him

I call for him
and I know - without science or senses -
That he is near
Megan Hammer Feb 19
Light-hearted in the beginning
Where bickering in your bed
Turned into something you won't hear of
What can I say
The door is not open

You keep it shut
But that's all you know
A wall is a wall
It's slim chances you'll get over it
But you can see out the window

Sometimes, you draw the blinds
You like to see the people go by
Whose lives you will never touch
I tell you what they think
But you just want them to know your name

How it could be on the other side of the wall
If you could grow outside the bungalow
If I could just break it down
Build a new one with the door wide open
Maybe then, you'd see what I'm saying

But there already is a door in this wall
I love you too much to ignore it
So I have to exit to show you where it's at
Megan Hammer Dec 2019
Call me up and call me kiddo
You're getting too old for this
I think this as I hop over your ledge
Into the Island of Peter James Pan

I fly back and come over
You fly off the handle too much
Want what you want when you want it
I value patience

I can find the brightest star
But you won't look up
Say you've had enough of my thoughts
I wouldn't expect a lost boy to understand

But I'm sorry for the second night
When you just wanted to talk
And I was in a rush to Neverland
I wish you'd ask me how I am again

I never expected you to be more than a fun night
But now I know your bed and you gave me a toothbrush
I was too quiet to come through your window
I don't know if you will leave it open anymore

But maybe it's time for you to be Wendy
And forget all of us who were up in the clouds with you
Maybe it's time to fulfill your father's legacy
I know it means the world to you

But I will remember you saying you liked my questions
Because they were different from the others
The kiss on the forehead
Safe in the island of your arms

And I will remember your ledge
Whether or not you remember me
For Z.J.
Megan Hammer Nov 2019
Champaign and snow, the Cranberries song was on
It was warm sleeping in the bathtub
And I can still hear his hum sending me off
Picking me up, moving me to the bed

How the morning came and I heard the small planes fly on
Beginning to cry because it's time

To turn off the Cranberries,
To go back out into the cold
To hum an old song and send you off

The plane flies above the hotel
So I take a long, hot shower
Megan Hammer Nov 2019
Take me to Treasure Island beach
It’s way too cold for me
But I'll go swimming in the sea with you

Or we can get the bikes
We'll ride along the Pinellas highway
Racing to the bottom is what I do best

Come on, what would you like to do next?
The store - I'll get your coffee and your dates
And when it gets late, we’ll go to the bay
Say a film you'd like to watch

The lock is somewhere in Bruges
He put it on the bridge by the hotel room
The one we lived in for a time
When we went rogue in the mountains

Our crime on the coast of Normandy
Hand me the shell and I'll keep it forever
But take back your coat
It's too cold for you to be without it

Stand here where you stood
Kidnap me as you thought you would
It could be so nice to ride across the border

Take me to Treasure Island beach
We'll find a boat and float away
In Gibraltar, we'll never come back
Megan Hammer Nov 2019
It’s always the same - as always
We go round and round in your car
The Old Northeast or somewhere in between
Under the overpass - where did we park?
In the grass, up the steps, the yellow room

And where did we resume?
A Wednesday night at a dive bar
They're all doing ******* in the bathroom
Round and round the corner - your car is blue
New place, but it’s still a yellow room

It’s always the same - the blue car
Where a light never goes out
With footprints from high knee boots and sneakers
Where all my counterthoughts become undone
Beer on the counter and a couch you’re gonna take me on

Take me into your new car
It’s not always the same after all
Good things come to those who wait
Tonight is always different with you
At last, I get to know more than the yellow room
For Basil.
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