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Maytin Paige Mar 2015
A memory makes smile.
That moment sparked a fire. It was everything I had wished for.
I always wanted those moments, within these years, that I could look back on, in 40 years, and laugh or even say how stupid I was. That's what I wanted.
I was such a cautious child though. I knew it was better to be safe rather than sorry.
Honestly, it was when I turned sixteen that I realized that I would rather be sorry than safe.
I'd rather regret something of spontaneous moments than regret not taking a chance at whatever the topic may be.
It was when I went fifteen mph over the speedlimit to beat you, yet still lose, did I feel that adrenaline. Maybe it was just for a moment, but I looked forward to it each day.
You and I would race back to our destination
and tease each other about as soon as our vehicles were put in park.
I didn't understand how in the hell you would beat me each day.
It was because you went sixty-five mph in a thirty-five zone.
It makes me smile.
It was a moment that sparked a fire.
I can now look back and laugh about how stupid I once was.
Maybe I am stupid, but I'm happy.
No way that your Dodge Neon can beat my baby.
Maytin Paige Mar 2015
You feel your heart begin to crack and crumble
as it begins to shatter.
You finally realize that the two people that you always thought would be there want nothing to do with you.
You want to exclaim your pain, but you hold back
afraid that one will notice.
You're afraid because you almost want her to notice.
In all reality, you know she won't.
You want them both to notice but you've realized they don't want a thing to do with you.
There was a time when you meant something, everything, to them.
You still feel that they mean something, everything, to you.
They helped you through so much.
You did everything you could to help them and to keep their wonderful smiles afloat from all the troubles they had too.
You feel your heart begin to crack and crumble
as it begins to shatter,
as you begin to cry,
as it becomes harder to breathe,
as you realize they're done with you.
Your heart begins to crack and crumble
as it begins to shatter.
*Things change and people change.
i am not a damsel in distress.

neither am i an idle princess waiting for some knight in shining armor to come and save her.

i am the dragon.

and you should go save yourself.
Maytin Paige Feb 2015
You've seen me with wildly frizzy hair
in holey trashed jeans
with the thinnest level of makeup.
You've talked to me as I try to flirt with you
texted me as I try to flirt with you.
You must have some idea that I find interest in you.
You have yet to see my dark side.
While I feel you are showing a blooming interest,
there's days that I feel nothing-as if you don't care for me.
You have yet to see me have a meltdown
to see me freak out on someone
to see me be wildly angry.
Will it scare you away?
Will it make you run?
I'm more afraid of scaring you off.
Please don't be afraid...
Maytin Paige Feb 2015
I only ever seem to have flirtationships.
Never relationships.
I feel that's what tires me most.
The thought of something being wrong with me runs its course-
over and over.
It's no question that you can tell when I like someone.
Body language is readable and I can't seem to change it.
A smile is usually constant.
My laugh is often.
My face usually reddens and I feel warm.
I am obviously aware of their presence.
A casually awkward conversation turns flirty
and ****** references
begin to enter everyday conversation.
Everything's going great.
Then fate takes it toll.
They decide to drop me,
or we slowly die out
and grow apart.
My heart breaks
due to the attachment that grew
because I saw distance in our flirting-
while they must've seen a sentence affair.
it's me
it's always me.

Yet, I can never figure out what is quite wrong with me
and no cares to tell me.
Someone new comes along and the cycle begins over again
and there's nothing I can do to help it.
I always have flirtationships,
Never relationships.
  Jan 2015 Maytin Paige
Gwen Pimentel
the thing is
i loved you
more
than i should've
Maytin Paige Jan 2015
It was a Thursday morning,
when a boy, so young and full of life,
fell victim to his own mind.
It's truly a tragedy that his best friend went over to skip school with him,
only to find him lifeless.
Teenagers, parents, friends, and family all became united once more to overcome the sad emptiness they felt from their loss.
Something so unpredictable. I can only hope that he had the time of his life. And I wish he could've realized that it's never too late.
RIP Collin.
1.15.15

*Such a tragedy that you believed it wouldn't get better. So sad that you will no longer be here to add life and excitement to others' day.
Please understand that you are a perfect angel and there's always people who care. It's never too late.
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