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maskedmarlin Apr 2020
like a knife at my stomach I hold onto your memories and not knowing what I did wrong. 

Multiple times a day I drive it deep inside over and over now forced to live where I don't belong. 

All alone, lost and scared I really don't know what to do.

 I never imagined there would be a time without you.

So now my days are all the same I wake up cry and go back to sleep.

Than wake up cry back to sleep and when is late I pray for forever sleep.
maskedmarlin Mar 2020
why
if I was never meant to have someone to love and who would love me.
then why was I cruelly let get close to just taste and see.
I seen the world slowed to a halt and then disappear.
witness my entire world change from how I saw life to the things I fear.
that longing for someone the instant you turn away and the need to look back again.
and when you do have to part no matter why your gut tightens within.
but when you do come back your world gets a little bit brighter
that feeling of never wanting to let go so you hold on a little bit tighter.
but now alone another night I cry myself to sleep.
again the world beginning to fade but in a different way as I fall into the deep.
my design was not made to be loved but was made to need it
maskedmarlin Mar 2020
Dark, cold and empty is what I am inside.
After all that once was slowly died.
Killed with words of fear and hate.
Left alone just outside hell's gate.
It's told me for years I'm no good and I'm ugly.
That I'm worthless and no one will ever love me.
Tearing me down over and over again.
I can feel it staring at me with an evil grin.
Slowly I slip further and further into insanity.
If only there was a way to be set free.
By this point, I'm beginning to think it's a little late.
That I'm stuck with the darkness faster closing in as my fate.
maskedmarlin Mar 2020
everyone you know already thinks your crazy.
always being locked inside your head.

scared and depressed you hide so no one can see.
thinking no one cares and you're better off dead.

where once stood a man now looms an empty shell.
alone in the shadows with a story almost to dark to tell.

your completely worthless and no good,
and don't belong on this side of the ground.

trying to move on inching foreword in tell with pleasure I tear you back down.

you will finally fall for the last time to die where you fell,
slowly eyes closing freeing me of this endless hell.
maskedmarlin Mar 2020
I wish I could silence the voices in my head, filling it with lies and hateful things.
Making every day just another I dread, and worrying about the evil it brings.
Words of  hate and lies, it's always trying to ruin me.
Every night with tears that fill my eyes, in a life I don't want to be.
Wishing this night would be my last, and not to be here in the morning.
Being flooded with memory's of the past and all the evil things I already seen.

— The End —