Luna Elora

Luna Elora Feb 2017

Please.

I'm sorry I'm not the perfect wife.
I'm sorry that all I do is sleep.
I'm sorry I'm so depressed
I'm sorry  I can't do anything right.
I'm sorry I wanted to feel like I mattered.
I'm sorry I made you angry.
I didn't want to make you angry.
Dear god How I didn't want to make you angry.
I'm sorry I'm losing myself
I'm sorry I couldn't just smile always.
I'm sorry I cut a little bit.
They aren't deep.  I promise.
Please don't be angry.
that's what I'm scared of
But what I'm scared of most.
Is that you mean it when you said
You didn't care what I did anymore.
And these tiny cuts
Will be the push.
For you to want a divorce.
I'm such a failure.
I'm so ******* stupid.
I ****** up the only love I'd find again.
I didn't cut deeply because you'd be so mad if I did.
You're still gonna be mad at me.
I already know it.
Please... Please don't be mad.
I was bad.  I'll do better
Just please.
*don't be mad

Luna Elora Feb 2017

Desperately sinking.

For a moment
I would like to say
No matter what
I will always love you.
And that even if
It's just for a moment.
lie to me
And tell me you love me too.

#depressed #crying #youdontcareanymore #weremarried

Luna Elora Oct 2016

Seasonal joy

From Falls first embrace
From what I had known
To be Winter's second kiss
And all twas shown
To be Spring's warming love
Into Summer.

#love #questions #season #ponder

Luna Elora Aug 2016

Memory

Once I came back
I read some of my work
And I can't begin to recall
Who you are.
You see, my memory has been fading for awhile my dear.
I only seem to remember the important things.
*I guess you weren't one of them

It's been close to a year since I've written. And I can't recall a **** person I wrote about except for the person in "Crush"

#memories #forgetful

Luna Elora May 2015

Jerry II

I don't know your true intention.
While I'm playing Red Dead Redemption.
You seem to make me smile in a way nobody else can.
I just mean....what the **** man?
Your attitude changed so abruptly.
I don't know what I did.
But you think the only way to feel better about your situation, is to drown yourself in alcohol.
***** preferred.
Just to make your thoughts slurr.
In a blur.
And put your head in a spin.
This isn't how you win.
Our love is like the Joker and Harlequin.
We're both clowns.
But your emotions aren't a joke.
I can't let you choke.
As I suffocate on my own tears.
You supply all of my fears.

For you, Jerry.

#love #depression

Luna Elora Apr 2015

We are blood but not family.

We share a special thing you and I.
We share a mother.
We used to share a home.
We shared our toys
Our secrets.
But you never shared love.
You're my sister.
You're some of the only blood I have.
And when you say
Those words
"*******"
In my direction
I keep it a descression.
Because I can't believe you'd say those things to your only sister.
You can't lie and say you don't miss her.
You miss what we had to share.
Especially our mother.