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As I lay in bed
All I can hear is
Every breath I take
Every click of the clock
Every time my heart beats

Realizing
Every single thought is about you

As I sleep, as I dream
it is always about  you

As I wake as i feel
Every waking moment
is all about you

OH
how much i love you
Because of my past
Is why I am this way

Because of my past
I expect these things

Because of my past
These are the things i know

Because of my past
This is who i am

Really

Why does one only dwell on the hard times and forget the good
Why does one not focus on being proactive instead of reactive

The past is the past
If you dwell on the past
You will never change

Change your sights and
Come to Terms
 Mar 2015 Livingdeadgirl
Gwen
Do NOT tell someone who is upset about Zayn leaving One Direction that they need to "Calm down", or "Get over it"
Everyone is entitled to be upset over anything they want, and this is one of them.
Five years of five guys being together, and whether or not you liked them since day one, or you started liking them a day ago,
You have the right to be sad about this.
Imagine your favorite band member leaving the band they were in.
No more posters with them on it,
No more shirts,
No more award shows,
No more ZaynMalik1D on twitter.
Let us be sad.
I am so upset over this and no matter how many times you tell me to shut up and move on, I will still be upset.
My heart, hurt's so and is so swollen
It has been poisoned, by your love
It's infection, draining through my eye's
Cramping me over, at times as I cry

As I wipe my eye's, from your life of lies
The infection has ruined, so many shirts
Constantly wiping, the poison from my eyes's
My heart shrinks, to a withered *****

I feel that I have been played, for such a fool
For the remainder of this life, i am reminded
Of a sickened heart, that can longer exist
I now wear, my heart on my sleeve
Awaking in the dawn
Asking for a new life
As I wipe the tears from my eyes

Our life of youth is now behind us
The real special times of my life

When responsibilities were simple
To cut the grass
Put out the trash
Go to school
Do my home work

Where games were fun
Sleepovers and board games
Hide and seek, your it
Street football
Tackle the man with the ball

A fight because 2 of us got mad
Was only to fight your best friend
A neighborhood brawl with the next block
fist only

When getting in trouble was for
Not being home when the street lights went out
Skipping school and getting caught
Out of mom's screaming voice when she wanted you

punishment
A belt or a paddle
from mom, your teaches or
your friends parents
A go to your room, no TV

Our secrets were kept
Our hidden tree house with a rope swing
Our secret hiding spots
The girls we liked

Adventure were scary
Opening old coffins in the crematory
Catching snakes
Trapping whatever
Camping in the woods

When you got nervous was from
Playing seven minutes in heaven
Kissing your first girl
Friends picking on you

excitement was a trip
Holidays from school
Christmas
Thanksgiving
Easter
New years & the 4th of July, fireworks
And the next dad collecting what didn't go off
Lets not forget the ice cream truck

Some of our mischievous ways
Throwing water balloons at stranger  
Making tennis ball grenade launchers
Running in the fog behind the mosquito truck

to make a buck
was to cut grass
get a paper route
sell anything

I could go own but I'm sure you get the point
Our generation is gone and the youth will never know

Now it's high tech and everything is a crime
Kid's stay in the house playing video games
 Mar 2015 Livingdeadgirl
Traveler
With a blank look in her eyes
She exist in our relationship
She moves without mind
As I bail out her sinking ship

A break from her stare
To ***** about cash
We have more than we need
Not counting her stash

Without a word
Without a plan
She dumps her cares
Where ever they land

With both our burdens
Upon my back
She's off to play
And that is that

So now you ask
What will I do
Afraid of change
I'll stay a fool...
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