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It's 11:11
I wish for you
I wish for happiness
I wish for your arms
I also wish for you to love me
You to kiss me
You to fall asleep next to me
I wish I could return your compliments
Return the love
I wish you knew you deserved better but more than that I wish you'll never leave
I need you yknow
I wish I wasn't this exausted
I wish it wasn't getting sucky again, like before
11:12
You sob and cry
You want to die
You're out of friends
Ready to end
You're bleeding out
You try to shout
But you're ignored
Pain u would hoard
You're all alone
Can see your bones
You were so sad
Your life so bad
Your parents fight
Cut? You just might
You are depressed
You are distressed
Why won't they help?
Let out a yelp
They're distracted
But you acted
You're about to die
But you only sigh
the harder you hit
the more i want to prove that i can take it.
the bruising is expansive
and the canvas is almost full.
strangely,
my single fear is that you may switch gears
and choose a new medium with which to shape me
into exactly what i told you i would never become...


--your tragic masterpiece.
 Mar 2014 Leah McGuire
Sad Girl
Look inside myself
to find
what is decaying me,
rotting me,
eating at my soul.

Rid myself of it.
Rip it from it's home
where it has become
so comfortably warm.

But once I find it;
rationalize with
whatever it may be.

Once I know
what hides within me;
if I let it go,
I'll surely feel worn
and even without it
I'll always be torn.

*k.d.
 Mar 2014 Leah McGuire
Theia Gwen
You never fail
To point out every single flaw
Never forget to remind me
Of everything I do wrong
I was stupid getting 60's,
Still stupid on honor roll
And you never cared about my ADHD
Always comparing me to someone else
I already know how worthless I am
I tell myself all the time
No, this isn't teenage angst
I've been sad for years
You've made me feel alone
And that's why I love him,
He told me the things you should have said
All along
I think this revelation is far overdue
The fault isn't in me,
The fault is in you
To my mother.
 Mar 2014 Leah McGuire
Emily
YOU WILL NOT FALL IN LOVE IN A HOSPITAL, YOUR SKIN WILL SMELL LIKE THE DYING AND YOUR LIPS WILL CRACK AND YOU WILL NOT FIND BEAUTY

I USED TO THINK I WOULD FIND SOLACE IN THOSE SANITIZED WHITE HALLS BUT ALL I EVER FOUND WAS MY OWN EMPTY EYES STARING BACK AT ME FROM THE UNBREAKABLE SUICIDE-PROOF MIRROR AND THERE WAS NO COMFORT IN MY BRUISED TENDER FACE

HOSPITALS ARE NO PLACE FOR YOUNG GIRLS WHO HAVE NOT YET TURNED AWAY FROM LIFE AND THEY ARE NO PLACE FOR KISSING YET YOU READ ABOUT MOUTHS FINDING EACHOTHER IN THE DARKEST HOUR AND YOU THINK OF CEMENT HOSPITAL WALLS; THERE IS NO DARKNESS IN HOSPITALS, JUST PURPLE FLUORESCENT LIGHTS THAT MAKE YOU LOOK SO PALE YOU MIGHT JUST REALIZE THE IMMINENCE OF YOUR OWN DEATH.

YOU WILL NOT FALL IN LOVE IN A HOSPITAL.
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