My essential ***** is essentially orphaned
Drifting alone to the tune of sad songs
That beat with the beat of your chest
Enveloped within a fantasy it developed:
That our hearts may have won by becoming as one

My reasoning mind finding reasons to mind
The emotions that keep me in motion
Still swallowed by love for you now I am swallowing to
Try erasing the doubts that are daunting:
That I'll never be whole with this hole where you were

My full body fully embodies the emptiness
That lays down in places where only you've laid
There's times when my soul can think solely of you but
I would be remiss not to be reminiscing:
A piece of me now rests in peace with the first that I loved

I am in a place where I used to be free
But now each day tears me apart mockingly

My loved ones are crying
My loved ones are dying

The pain chips at me, it is pain so it must
It proves that life only turns dust back to dust

I need your love now more than I ever did
But you wouldn't know, you have no more to give

fists clenched, bile burning
thoughts screaming, stomach churning
no moment of peace

Do you do what I do too?
Do you lie with starry skies
Unable to rest your eyes?
Do you stay in cold, still wait
Just to see the sunrise break?
Do you hope those first few rays
Can wake your mind from its bleak haze?
Do you wish it's painted bright
To ease aside the lonely night?

Morning dew, if you do too,
You saw today was gray in hue
But since you do what I do too,
Know someone's in the dark with you

Losing touch with my reality
Body shaking, heartbeat quivering
Scared on a rooftop, too high to get down
I needed help, I needed you
And you, my constant, led me down

No more drugs for me, I said

Wishing this was not my reality
Body burdened, heartbeat heavy
Scared on a rooftop, but now I'm not high
I still need you, but can't have you
My constant, constantly on my mind

I can see it now, my fix was you
You were everything to me

No more drugs for me, I said
I guess that's why I lost you