I gave myself a bruise today
I didn't do it for fun
I did it for three reasons
This was reason one

I was born into a broken family
A broken family of four
It came to a point where this broken family
Just couldn't work anymore

I knew my parents wanted it to happen
My brother did too
They asked me, "Mom or Dad.
Choose."

I think I chose the wrong one
Because that one had a package
It gave me eternal scars
Ones that I couldn't bandage

Why did they ask me to choose
When I was only six?
It left damages that last forever
Ones that I cannot fix

That was reason one
Why I gave myself the bruise
They put all this pressure on me
But here is reason two

I feel like an outcast
Like I don't belong in this world
I feel like an ugly rock
While the rest are all pearls

Nothing I do feels right
I feel like I don't fit in
But it's not because of my
Face or my body or my skin

It is because of my family
People look at them weird
People say the harshest things
As if they couldn't hear

I know they are different
But why do you care
About what they do or who they are
Or what they wear?

That was the second reason
Why I gave the bruise to me
I understand that they are different
But here is reason three

I can't be myself
In my every day life
Because myself is unacceptable
And the opposite of lady-like

I like to yell
And play with the dirt
People say I wear pants
When I should wear a skirt

I like to wear my hair high
Up in a ponytail
I have stretch marks on my thighs
They are my years written in braille

I don't like to wear makeup
I think I look better without
Myself is unacceptable
Why can't myself be allowed?

I can't be myself
Because myself isn't approved
And that is the third reason
Why I gave myself the bruise

Cupcakes and jello,
Sun drops of yellow,
A year old prince smiles with glee,
Happiest times started off free.

One foot in and one foot out,
Each step weighted with doubt,
Wan smile for the camera snapping away,
Two years old today.

Messy hair and muddy feet,
Too much energy to take a seat,
Toothy three-year old smiles for Mummy's photo,
Looking as proud as winning the lotto.

Marvel comics and new-found heroes,
Fan-art drawn in multi-colored Biro's,
Cheeky grin to hang on the wall,
Four years old, 3 feet tall.

Backpacks and Elmers' glue,
Cafeteria food that's hard to chew,
Pose in school uniform, charcoal gray,
Five years old on this big day.

Ring pop marriages and rainbow smarties,
Confetti always being thrown at birthday parties,
Yours is no different, cup them in your hand,
Hold out six fingers and composedly stand.

Swimming lessons and soccer practice,
Coaches being overwhelmingly fractious,
Hugging the soccer ball to your chest,
Seven years old, smilin' your best.

TV marathons and video games,
Struggling to learn hockey players' names,
Staring intently at the wrestling match,
Eight years old, hoping to catch.

Game of tag and playground fights,
Pretending to be English knights,
Awkward personality you've yet to define,
No longer eight, now you're nine.

Reruns of Spongebob Squarepants, ******-Doo,
First time trying fried tofu,
New experiences 'cause now you're ten,
Eight years away from joining the men.

6th grade comes and 6th grade passes,
Schedule in hand trying not to be late for classes,
Remember your locker combination 1-20-7,
Sigh of relief that you're eleven.

Too thin, too slim-
Too fat, not "that"-
Hallways you seldom dwell,
Twelve, trapped in a living Hell.

Bitter, reserved, aggressive you turn,
Nagging from parents makes your stomach churn,
Yelling "I hate you," till your face burns red,
Thirteen is an age of words over-said.

In a rash decision, you stole a beer,
A crowd welcomes you with an electric cheer,
Only fourteen, your choices will sway,
With time, you'll rue this day.

Not young, not old,
"Be fun", "be bold",
Caught in the middle of the unforeseen,
Not quite fifty, still fifteen.

A year has passed and you're feeling tired,
Can't bear to tell your father you've been fired,
Sixteen has brought you misery and sorrow,
Dreading the fruits of tomorrow.

Nothing is "for fun" anymore,
All this working out is making you sore,
Your head gives in and you pass out cold,
Seventeen and you've already been sold

Eighteen candles in one big breath,
Closer and closer to inevitable death,
         You feel so old already,
                Want to take it steady...
But you can't.

lazy sunday
       hazy monday
          you found me on the street

dizzy tuesday
     frizzy wednesday
          you took me for a treat

flurry thursday
      blurry friday
          you threw me into the cold

saturday, saturday
     when did i get so old?

There is new air
        and old air
             and fresh air
                    and stale air
                          cold air
                               hot air
             and air in-between.

There are young people
                   and older people
                            and corrupt people
                                  and naive people
                                      mean people
                                          kind people
              and people in-between.

I'd take air over people
         because
                people can be
  (sadly)
  (regrettably)
  (unfortunately)
                      S E E N

Holy yards of hallowed houses of prayer
rise in sublime chants and hymns
at this hour of the blessed dawn
when auspicious shades of light
grace the scabbards of swords
long sheathed and covered in shadows
of figures on the stained glasses

A divided land of long used to darkness
engulfing, rejoices: a saviour rises,
a hero who can unite and heal:
purple robe and the rag, Roman
and Celt: the long suffering realm
finds solace at last in order and justice;
A quest brews, of sacred chalices

In the noble hearts of faithful knights:
Alas, a tragedy in the shadows,
whither, famed Artorius, wise?
Hades schemes to ****** away
your Persephone to Annfwyn afar:
No mortal wounds could fell you alive,
But this, you carry on to Avalon.

If you were the sky
Then I'd be the sea
And when you shined bright
It would reflect in me.
When you're at rest
Then I am steady.
If you wanna get rough
I'm always ready.
Past closing at the bars
If you show me the stars
I'll open right up
And cast them out far.
And on the darkest night
If you won't shine a light.
Then I'm silent alongside you
Until you feel right.
We'll meet at the horizon
Where lovers will stare
And wonder with passion
Why they can't meet there.
And you'll share me a kiss
As bright as two suns.
When they meet in the middle
I'll know the days done.
And I can tell that's your way of saying to me.
Goodnight my love.
If you were the sky and I were the sea.