On the first day I sat
I stared at my hands
I silently prayed
Please...get better.

After a week
Things only got worse
Family began to show up
Some from far away.

I didn't know how to act
Seemed like a reunion
People greeted me saying
"Oh honey,  it's been too long!"

I wanted to scream
I wanted them to understand
My dad was dying!
But, I knew he wouldn't like it.

My dad would say
"Show some respect mija"
He'd want me to say hi
He'd expect me to greet my elders.

So I did.  Every time.  
Every newly arrived relative
I faked a smile
Then sat and silently prayed

I mirrored your movements
Now my pain is the same
There are no winners
In this foolish game

I followed the leader
Should've gone my own way
When I asked for your help
You had nothing to say

I believed all your lies
Learned the examples you set
At the end of our journey
All I find is regret

So full of excuses
For the life that you've lived
You're  sorry for nothing
Yet ask me to forgive

You don't need my mercy
You need a new way to be
Take a new road
Find a way to break free

These are my last words
They're for you from my heart
The strength is inside you
Go and find your new start

I wait....for the moment when I see your face again
I wait....for the healing that will come with the sound of your voice
I wait....to breathe again

I long....for the feel of your hand on my face
I long....for the warmth of your embrace
I long....to feel whole again

I find a reason....to smile every day
I find a reason....not to cry myself to sleep every night
I find a reason....to believe in miracles

I hope....that I am worthy of your love when at last we meet
I hope....that I make you proud
I hope....you know how much I love you

I know....I will see you again
I hold on....to that thought

I have to......
If I don't....I will break

I can't fall apart
I am depended on.....so....I wait.

The fear brings anxiety
The anxiety brings panic
With panic comes pain

Hope fades away
Depression sets in
guilt becomes your companion

The struggle is real
But it is not mine
She is the warrior

She fights
She reaches out
She crumbles

I watch
I listen
I cry

I am humbled by her strength
I am proud of her courage
I am broken by her sadness

But....I'm here....
For what ever she needs.....always.

I looked up and there you stood
A sparkle in your eyes
A smirk on your lips
You were as beautiful as I remembered

I looked a mess
Hair in a bun, no make-up
A dumbfounded look on my face
I didn't quite know what to say

You asked how I've been
Said you'd been thinking of me
You missed us
You never asked if I was with some one

I said I've been fine
I wasn't even lying
I hadn't thought of you in years
Still didn't quite know what to say

You asked for my phone number
Said you'd "hit me up"
We should get dinner some time
or maybe I could cook for you

That's when it all came rushing back
The way you used to look at me
when you wanted something
How hard it was to say no

You smiled at me
You actually leaned in
What were you thinking?
That I would allow it probably

I did not allow it
I knew how it would end
Didn't need to relive that episode
I finally knew exactly what to say

"No thanks, I'm good"
"Nice seeing you though"
And just like that...
Your beauty faded

You said "Just thought I'd be nice"
"but what ever, your loss!"
You showed your true self
and it was ugly

I just stood there and smiled
You couldn't hurt me
Not this time
This time I walked away

A skip in my step
A smile on my lips
Dignity intact
As I walked away

I'll deal with the loneliness
I'll suffer the pain
For you to have sunshine
I'll live with the rain

I'll laugh when you're happy
I'll cry when you're sad
When you suffer injustice
I'll scream when you're mad

I'll quietly love you
I'll stay by your side
I'll play the best friend
My true feelings I'll hide

As long as you're smiling
There's not much I won't give
I'm here to protect you
As long as I live

There's no need for you to try so hard
You don't need to break a sweat
No need to lie to me
Every thing is pretty much set

I don't need to hear your insults
You don't have to hurt me so
No real need for such betrayal
For your real feelings to show

Others have already been there
Yes, I've seen it all before
My heart is in so many pieces
You don't have to break it any more

Please, just leave now
You're free to live the way you choose
Live your loud and happy life
I'll live mine quietly loving you

Oh, that I could make you feel what's in my heart.
I wish you could feel how much I love you.
That I could show you how much you mean to me,
and leave you without a shadow of a doubt how
much that is.

To some how articulate how important you are.
You...my story.....my reason......
for living, laughing, crying, breathing...being.
My true north....my truth.

I wish you could truly feel my love.
That all I had to do is hold you, kiss you,
look into your eyes and you would know.
That I completely, absolutely, irrevocably love you.

With all that I am....all that I was....all I'll ever be....
I love you.
That is my wish.
Oh!  If only you could feel what's in my heart!

Late at night and I'm still awake
afraid to close my eyes.
We tried to fix us, too little too late
Now I'm dreading the sunrise.

I know in my heart, you've made up your mind
Come morning, you're gonna leave.
I'll stay here broken...left behind
but I'll grant you your reprieve.

Perhaps someday you'll come back to me
but really, I think you won't.
I guess that's how it's supposed to be
We must move on so we can grow.

but I'm so gonna miss you.....

I'm counting every breath you take
as I pretend to sleep.
I know you're laying there awake
Why won't you talk to me?

I wonder just what I should say
when the sun lights up the sky.
Should I ask for one more day
or should I just say goodbye?

I guess you want me to go,
guess it must be too late.
Better that I find my own road
before your love turns to hate

but I don't want to leave you.....

I bow my head in prayer Dear Lord
and I lay at your feet
Those that suffer, those in pain,
Your children that are in need.

Your people that are preyed upon
are crying out in fear
Heed their prayers, protect them,
and all that they hold dear.

Touch the hearts of those in power
for they can end their pain.
With your guidance the sun will shine
and chase away the rain.

Help us to find our courage
to keep fighting the good fight.
May we choose the righteous path,
put aside differences and finally unite.

I have faith in you my God
I know you are the way.
Love can conquer hate this night
and make way for a brand new day.

                                       Amen.

fingertips tentative on blushing cheeks•gentle warmth for blossoming kisses•a sigh escapes as our lips tenderly touch•shivers dance on my naked skin•eyes closed, the moon trembles•stars explode as tongues entwine•lost in the touch of your caresses•sensations of nervous anticipation•fingertips paint glistening skin•heated blood rushing, bodies blushing•deep moaning breaths as hands explore•modesty replaced by uninhibited desires•lips brushing the soft ivory neck•teeth detecting a hot rushing pulse•taken by surprise at my eagerness•an unashamed longing to please•her back arching with aching yearning•giving herself up, surrender so beautiful•sweet blinding tension quickly intensifies•with ****** cries, i unconsciously call your name•my mind explodes into bright oblivion•in echoes of her shuddering fulfillment•thunder recedes into candle lit night•in quivering gasps, i breathe you in•your now familiar skin so close and warm•collapsing in deep honeyed afterglow•untangling each other to gentle caress•with knowing glances, we'll sleep-in tomorrow

Warm balmy air
Ruffles your hair
Smell of smoke
fills my lungs

Sudden lean in
Sends me reeling
Taste of drink
upon your tongue

Bad boy image
I, so timid
Your hands gentle
as they explore

Touch so tender
Sweetest surrender
A little further
than I'd gone before

Beautiful and honest
Sincere in our promise
That we would always
be true

Convinced and so sure
Innocent and pure
You'd always love me
And I would love you

I wasn't looking for it
still....I found love
Like a sweet dream
that I couldn't quite reach

I tried to let it go
still....I hung on
Like a simple fool
I waited for you to see me

You never even looked.

I was only ever a friend
still....I cherished our moments
Like a faithful side kick
I waited for your attention

I watched as you fell for another
still....I thought you'd come to your senses
Like in the movies, we'd find forever
You'd finally see me

You never even looked.

It won't be long now
It will happen soon
I'll be getting over you any day now
I can feel it

That loathsome ache will soon be gone
This feeling of suffocation will subside
I'll breathe again
I'll finally feel at peace

I won't feel that gripping
all consuming fear
The panic that has been my companion
ever since you left

No...I'll be letting all that go
Any moment now
I'll be free....
It's coming

The last bit of you
will soon be gone
No more pain....but..
I wonder....if maybe...

Will I miss you?
When I finally let it all go?
Will I miss it?
Should I just...keep it a little longer?

Perhaps I should still think of you
Only every once in a while....
Just for as bit.
For just a little longer...

As long as I exist I will love you
As long as I am me, I am yours

If after this life there's another
I want to spend it loving you more

I've tucked away each memory
I've memorized your face

My love will last forever
It transcends through time and space


For as long as I exist, as long as I am me
What ever life I live, where ever it may lead

I will always love you

I could let the past rest in the past
I could find faith that this time will last
I could be yours once more
I could....but what for?

I could be your perfect lover
I could believe there won't be another
I could believe you're different from before
I could...but what for?

It would just be deja vu
It would end up me with out you
It would send me back to hell
It would...if I fell

It would be a big mistake
It would be so hard to take
It would end in your farewell
It would...if I fell

I could let go of these delusions
I could see through all your illusions
I could realize you're just in it for the thrill
I could.....and I will

I'll leave the past in the past
I'll find faith in me at last
I'll be stronger than before
I'll do this and so much more

I could smile and stand alone
I could make it on my own
I could live a life well lived
I could....and I did

With a tenderness that surprises me
you take me in your arms

Slowly you kiss my cheek
and whisper in my ear "Your call"

It's up to me.....yes....no....
Your fingers trace my jaw....lightly

I know how this will end....but...
I want this

I kiss your chin....and...it...is....on
Too late, There's no turning back

Tomorrow will come with it maybe regret
but....I want this

The look in your eyes is intense
You say "I'm gonna take my time with you"

I shiver with anticipation of
what's to come

For a moment...a brief moment
I am fear and nerves...then you kiss me

All fear is gone, in its place....desire
I want this

I close my eyes and I finally say it
"I want this"

No turning back now
tomorrow be ******

I want this

Danger
Code red
We're both feeling the heat

Forbidden
We can't
Compelled, our eyes meet

Exigency
Urgent thirst
Pictures flash in my mind

Desire
Burning hunger
Our bodies entwined

Electric
Your eyes
Provoking gleam as you stare

Desirous
Ardent yearning
A most torrid affair

Savor
A moment
We planned it just right

Delicious
Each touch
As we keep out of sight

Bewitched
I'm hooked
Consumed by your passion

Elated
To know
That was only a fraction

Breathe
Gain control
All in good time

Inevitably
This night
We'll know pleasure, sublime

If I could, I would
slow down time
so that I could stay
in this moment
for as long as possible.

If I could, I would
take as many years
as possible to
let this moment unfold.

This moment with you.

I would take my time
and memorize every
line of your face.
I would run every
silky strand of your
hair through my fingers.

I would take my time
and linger over every kiss.
I would savor the sweet
smell of your skin.
Revel in the sound
of your deep throaty
laugh.

In this moment with you....

I would show you
just how much I love you.
I would say it over and
over again.
I would marvel at just
how perfectly I fit in
your arms.

I would, If I could....

Instead....I'll hug you
and ask you how
you've been.
I'll talk with you
about times past,
then smile through
my tears as you walk away.

If I could dance with you
Just once around the room
My dreams would all come true
....to dance with you

If I could kiss your lips
Eyes closed, hands on your hips
It would make my heart skip
....to kiss your lips

If I could hold you tight
In my arms, through the night
All in my life would be just right
.....to hold you tight

I can't dance with you
Or hold you the whole night through
I can't kiss you tenderly
....it's just not meant to be

But if I could....I'd be whole again

Two poems written by my great niece Layla for my sister (her grandma, whom she calls Yaya)  and me, whom she calls Lur.  
She wanted to use my real name and she sounded it out.  Lura is what she came up with.  I love her so much and when I read her poems my heart melted.  I told her I would share them and she got
so excited.  She wants her feed back so have at it.  fyi, she's 9 years
old going on 20!


For her Yaya....

Yourself

Awesome

You're the best

Awesome grandmother

and mine....

Loving

Unique

Radiant

Amazing story teller

I hate you
You're ugly and weak
I hate the way you talk
Acting humble when it's praise you seek

You talk a big game
Never do what you say
Give every one advice
But don't live your life that way

Quick to judge another
You have some nerve
When your own faults are piled so high
It really is absurd

Every one thinks you're so perfect
When deep down you know you're fake
You act like you have all the answers
When really you're full of mistakes

No need to get mad
I only speak the truth
It's for your own good
I don't mean to be uncouth

It's better that it comes from me
Than from anothers inspection
Who else than the girl in the mirror?
You can't argue with your own reflection.

Really thought I'd found true love

Evil entered the picture

Prison was my life with you

Ugly soul as black as sin

Loving you my greatest regret

Staying away my greatest   accomplishment

I am free from you

Villain of my story

Exculpation....never

I can scream
I can cry
I can curse the sky
And still, nothing will change

I still cry though
I can't help it
I still ask why
And still, nothing changes

The pain is still the same
It doesn't lessen
It's ever-present
And still, I go on

I still cry though....I can't help it

Secrets...
I have many
Skeletons....
A closet full
I've lost count of my regrets...
Endless array of excuses too

Memories....
I suppress them
Fears....
I push them back
They can't hurt if I don't remember...
Keep it dark, fade to black

Healing....
That's a fantasy
Healthy mind....
A far off dream
I'll never just be "normal"
Happy wasn't meant for me

Acceptance...
Thought I'd achieved it
Forgiveness....
Thought I forgave
Thought I put it all behind me....
Memories coming now in waves

Bits and pieces....
Keep on flashing
Pictures....
Forming in my mind
Wish that door would stay locked tightly
I'm afraid of what I'll find

How....
To keep it locked away
Close.....
The door lock it tight
Put the monsters in the closet....
May they never see the light

I didn't want to kiss you
I didn't want to melt into you
I wanted to be strong
I wanted to push you away...
But I couldn't

I didn't want to cry
I didn't want to break
I wanted to be angry
I wanted to hurt you
But I couldn't

I was weak
I kissed you back
I cried as you held me
I want to hate you so bad....
But I can't...I just can't

The sky is touched with dawn
As morning conquers night

Day is fast approaching
I sit still....waiting for the light
And think of you

Let go, surrender
We'll go, together
Not fast, but slow
I'll show you forever

Your words, not mine
Believed, time after time
Now I've opened my eyes
I see through your lies

No more wasting my time
live your life, I'll live mine
My broken heart still beats
I continue to breathe

I get stronger each day
As the pain fades away
Every moment of pain
Was not suffered in vain

For I will not break
From my past mistakes
I let go of my past....
Find my self worth at last!

Another poem from my niece Layla.
She gets so excited at the thought of sharing her words.
She is 9 years old and the light of my life.


                    Grateful


You should be grateful for everything.
Everything you have is special.
So remember, always be grateful
For every thing you have.

                            Love, Layla Gross

I want to be better.
I even know how I can be.
Why don't I take that step?
It's like I'm stuck on re-peat.

I wish I was stronger.
I always thought I was.
With what I do, I show such weakness.
Will I ever be enough?

Why can't I break these walls,
that I've built up all around me?
I long to knock them down,
and finally live freely.

Why am I so lost,
If I know the way?
Will I ever find the courage
to finally seize the day?

Procrastination is my enemy.
Yet I hold him like a friend.
Walking in circles, there's no beginning,
so then how can it ever end?

I want to be better.
I even know how I can be.
Why don't I take that step?
It's like I'm stuck on re-peat......

We met by chance
We parted by choice

We loved completely
We still let it end

We lived with regret
We tried to reconnect

We failed

Please remind them as they sleep
That they're stronger than they think

Tell them that they make you proud
Soothe their sadness, fears, and doubts

Kiss them gently, hold them tight
Tell them that they'll be alright

Tell them just how much they're loved
By those around them and those above

And one more thing before you go
Don't forget to let them know

That you really are okay
Thank you for the visit and Happy Mother's Day

Darkness falls and I am free
Hiding in the shadows suits me
I am silent as I walk, look no one in the eyes
I hold no conversations, I am tired of the lies
Cold wind blows, it rustles dead leaves
I stand and shiver as they dance in the breeze
Alone at last, city sounds fade away
Creatures of the night, slowly take their place
I take comfort in their nearness, I can finally breathe
I don't fear the dark, nothing here's as black as me

I hope when next we meet it rains
A light Spring rain that makes the flowers grow

I'll meet you in a fresh green field
I'll run through the dewy grass straight
into your arms

The misty air will mix with my tears of absolute joy
We'll hold each other and kiss wet cheeks

Then all around us wild flowers will shoot up
As if they too are as happy as we are.
Filling the air with their perfume
And blooming in colors I've never seen before

And there we'll be
Whole once again...finally together
All three of us sisters, never to part
You'll show me everything as we wait for
the rest to come

Until that glorious moment, I'll keep you in my heart
Where you've always been
Where you'll always be

We got together tonight
We laughed and had some fun
We joked as we ate dinner

We played games and had a
few drinks
We listened to music and talked
and talked

When the night was over, your
first born
Your baby all grown up, kissed
you goodbye

She still kisses you goodbye...

She pressed warm lips to
the coolness of your urn and
whispered "Bye mom, I love you"
Then gathered her things and drove away

I didn't cry though I wanted to
Instead I gave her her moment
and pretended not to notice
That even now, though you're gone...

She still kisses you goodbye....

Some times I catch myself smiling as I look at her.  
My sister, deep in concentration hardly notices.
She is no procrastinator!  If it needs doing, get it done.
That's my sister.  Loyal, smart, strong.  She is woman.
That's what a real woman looks like.
She is beautiful.  She is wise.  She takes no ****.
She has a silly side.  Some times her mind is in the gutter.
She makes me laugh.  She keeps me honest.
I would be lost without her.  She's my best friend.
Her daughters agree, she is an amazing mom.
She raised them alone.  She never puts herself first. Ever.
She is a wonderful Grandma too.  Yaya is what she's called.
No one beats her at anything.  Especially loving her family.
We get on her last nerve and still she takes care of us.
One day I know we will have to be apart.  For a while at least.
I dread that day.  I fear it.  Not because she won't be here to care for us, but because she won't be here.  She won't make me laugh or yell at me to move my body.  She won't be laying in her bed with the t.v on playing games on her phone ignoring the t.v but content with the background noise.  
She won't insist on sharing a room with me even if there is an extra room.  She says she'd miss me.  I love when she says that.  I feel special, loved.  
That's my sister.  I'm so lucky to have been blessed with her. I love her so much.  That's all I wanted to say.  Just wanted to tell any one that wants to know it, that there is a lady in this world that is amazing and wonderful and kind and smart and capable of anything she puts her mind into.  And I love her with all my heart.

No street lights
Darkness complete
Moon as a night light
Your hand in mine

I look up
Awed at the sight
The stars are twinkling
Just for us

We stole the stars

I smile at the thought
You squeeze my hand
I look up at you
You lean in and kiss me

We dance you and I
In the dark
Under the moon
Beneath the stolen stars

You are beautiful
Like the spring time
Your scent a floral breeze

In anger like the summer
Your hurtful words blazing
Burn the heart of me

At times you are autumn
Your eyes reflecting calmness
Full of wisdom and peace

But mostly you are winter
Quiet, cold, and distant
A frozen land, that's lost to me

I watch the news and see  the world in turmoil
I listen to the cries of my people and my heart
is heavy.  I pray for them.  I ask God to intercede
on their behalf....but

I watch it all and a part of me is disconnected
For me timed stopped when I got the news
"She's gone"  I heard my niece say those words
And yet they would not penetrate, I couldn't
take it in.

It couldn't be....I've been praying so hard for
her recovery.  I have never prayed harder for
anything in my entire life.  She can't be gone
It's a mistake, has to be.....but no, it's true
She's gone.

So for me, everything that has happened since
feels like it's happening to some one else.
Like I'm watching a show or movie and the
protagonist has to keep going even though her
heart is broken to bits.

I know I've done things.  Made decisions, some of them
very important.  I'm planning a memorial for her.
I've been going on but.....it doesn't feel that way.
Hell, I've laughed with my family, I've cooked for them
I've eaten with them, but every night when I lay me down
It doesn't feel like I've done those things at all.

How can I have?  You're not here.  I look over at your
empty bed and I talk to you as if you're in it but you're
not!  So all that eating and laughing and cooking and
cleaning and getting things ready couldn't have happened!
You're not here and nothing is right!

And why does my chest feel like it's caving in?  Am I dying?
No....I'm not but you did!!!  How though?  I prayed so hard!
God is real.  I know this.  I believe this with my whole heart.
So then why?  Why did he say no?

The next second I answer my own question and the
answer is....what does it matter?  It doesn't.  He said no
and that's that.  You're gone and I'm here and I'm trying
God knows I'm trying.  But nothing is right anymore.


I'm frightened that I will never feel again the way I
felt snuggled in bed looking over and seeing you
snuggled up in yours.  I'd drift off listening to
you breathe in sleep and in that moment I was truly
blessed.  And I knew it.  I swear I did.

The same way I know now that nothing will ever be
the same again.  I'll have to figure out my new normal
What ever that is.  The worst part is that feeling that
no matter how hard I try I just can't seem to shake.

I still expect you to show up.  I'm still waiting for you
to walk through the door when I hear a car door slam
outside, but it's always some one else now and even
though I knew it wouldn't be you it's still breaks my
heart into even smaller pieces every single time.

Will that ever go away?  Some how I don't think it will.
Not this time.  Not with you.  You were my everything
My best friend, my teacher, my mother.....my sister.
I feel lost without you.  I miss you more than I thought
I could miss any one.

I want you back.  I know it's selfish as hell, but if I'm
gonna be honest I want you back.  I want you here
beside me.  I wanna laugh with you, cry with you,
be afraid with you, go through hard times with you.
Because nothing is as scary if I have you beside me.

Everything is scary with out you.  Even breathing feels
like a betrayal to you.  I should have stopped breathing when you did but.....God said no.  So I have to keep going.
Even if I don't want to.  I promised I would look after your
girls.  Your beautiful daughters that you gave to me.

And I will.  Even though I'm scared.  Even if I'm broken.
I will help them and your perfectly amazing granddaughter.
She's holding on and I will help her all I can.  I promise.
I guess that's why I'm still here.  For them. So for them
I'll find a way.  A way to live with out you.  But ****...
It hurts.  It hurts more than any thing I've ever had to face.

Most of all....I just really miss you so much.   As much as I love
you, I miss you.  I promise to be  the best person I can be.
I'll give to those in need, I'll forgive when some one hurts me.
I'll love with all my heart that way God will let me see you again.
That's what keeps me going.  That thought.  That one day,
some day....I'll be holding you again.  We'll all be together
again.  Please God let us be together again.

If you're here to break my heart
don't stay
If you're here to cause me pain
walk away
If you're here to end things
I know it's too late

It doesn't matter if you love me
It doesn't matter if you leave
I'll love you anyway
That's the way it's got to be

You don't have to be beside me
You don't have to hold my hand
You can go and live your life
It's okay, I understand

But my heart is stubborn
No matter what I say
No matter what I do
It will love you any way

So if your here to break my heart
Instead just walk away
Don't say you don't love me
Please....save me the pain

Because after all of it....
I'll love you anyway💖

Falling
Fallen
Fell

Losing
Lost
In this hell

Leaving
Left
Alone

Breaking
Broken
On my own

Rising
Risen
Hope anew

Standing
Stronger
Without you

If you close your eyes tight
The tears take longer to fall

Breathe deep
Inhale.....exhale

There....the pain was never there at all

Thinking Of You

Lately you've been on my mind
I wonder how you've been
Miss you from time to time
I didn't know we were a losing battle
You walked away like our love didn't matter

I fell in love with the man you showed me
And the woman that I became
I learned so much with you beside me
Tell me when did it all change?
You know that I adored you
But my love wasn't enough
You found your home in the arms of another
With out a choice I moved on and gave up

Lately you've been in my dreams
It feels impossible that you would think of me
Never found my happy ever after
If you don't ask you'll never get an answer

I fell in love with the man you showed me
And the woman that I became
I learned so much with you beside me
Tell me when did it all change?
You know that I adored you
But my love wasn't enough
You found your home in the arms of another
Without a choice I moved on and gave up

I had a chance to move on
But I shut down, closed the door
I should've just let you go

I fell in love with man that you showed me
And the woman that I became
I learned so much with you beside me
Tell me when did it all change?
You know that I adored you
But my love wasn't enough
You found your home in the arms of another
Without a choice I moved on and gave up.

She said that she loved us, that she couldn't live without us
She had secrets and needed our help
We sat by her side, held tight and all cried
and vowed she wouldn't face this herself

On our promise we made good, did everything we could
but in the end she needed more than we could give
She started out strong, then it all went so wrong
Now we don't even know where she lives

Through crocodile tears she fed on our fears
and took til we had nothing left
She packed up her bags, without one backward glance
Left only trash in the room where she slept

With our patience worn thin, she knew she couldn't win
She must find a new fool for his turn
Where they don't know she lies, she quietly hides
She doesn't care, just a new bridge to burn

But here is the twister, we still love our sister
and hope some day that she wins this fight
It may be, if we pray, very hard every day
We'll hear soon that she's found the light

As night fades to dawn
Day breaks and the world carries on

When the sun lays his weary head to rest
Mother moon rises, to take a breath

Even as the stars dim away
And ready the skies for another day

Through it all, this much remains true....
My love for you

Promises kept
Promises broken
Silence so loud
Words left unspoken


Bed feels so empty
Your absence feels wrong
Nights spent alone
Longing so strong

Everything's over
Before it's begun
Why am I lonely
If you were the one

You said goodbye
With the look in your eyes
Yet the words that you spoke
Were nothing but lies

Told tales of forever
Happy endings to be
But your words were illusions
Fairy tales and fantasy

Misery, my company
My world dressed in gray
Steady rain of sorrow
The sun has gone away

Drowning in the sadness
Yet my heart still beats
Suffocating madness
I feel incomplete

Silence so loud
Words left unspoken
No promises kept
My heart is just broken

In the end Justice prevailed
In the end we chose Love
In the end we chose to fight
And.....we won.

Now real change begins....

Once upon a time
A young girl was broken
She went on with her life
The horrors left unspoken

As she grew into a woman
Something wasn't right
She lacked sweet disposition
Always ready to fight

No one knew of her sorrows
No one knew of her lies
No one made it all better
They ignored all her cries

So she was made into a monster
And she found her prey
Now she was predator
Now she dealt the pain

No heroes are fighting
For our Princess
Instead the cycle repeats
And that's how the sad story ends.

There's dishes to wash
Dinner to be made
People to greet
All throughout the day

The cat needs food
The dog needs water
Let them out side
No time to shatter

The days are full
So many things to do
No time to break
No time to miss you

Until bed time....
That's when I cry
When the stars shine
and the moon lights the sky

I try to sleep
But I'm filled with sorrow
I hug your pillow
And wait for tomorrow

When the sun shines
There are things to be done
No time for sadness
My day has begun

So I put it away
In the back of my mind
I pretend you're just out
You didn't leave me behind

Until night time
When I lay my weary head
and once again I stare at your empty bed
That's when I miss you.....that's when I cry

A poem by my niece Layla.  She's 10 now and this was a school assignment.  Her topic was Hot air balloon.

                             Look down
                       From way up high
                 The atmosphere crumbles
              Like picnic baskets in the sky
                               Floating