while finding fascinating ways
to confront the ache in my jaw
i try to find a compromise
with the weather:
you can rain today
so long as the rivers
stay off the streets.

the key to life
is living long enough
that you no longer live with reality
but reality lives with you
in a perfectly melded
twisted version of codependence
in which the answers to your questions
don’t even matter that much anymore
because the questions are just
so much fun
to discuss

i wonder
how many times
you picked up the ringing phone
thinking
it was me
i wonder
how many times
it could
have been.
i wrote
so many things about you
when i thought
you loved me
and now i can't
even read my own poems
without remembering how happy
i thought
you made me
and how sad
you actually
did.

this december there won’t be much
airwaves and frequencies
at most i’m afraid
but i won’t mind
this december i might not even exist
but i’ll be there either way
oh i think this december
i’ll let the chill
follow me home
so that come january
i’ll already be cold enough to
let you go
when you leave.