i walked in not knowing
the storm that would soon be blowing
outside my little bubble
i was deeply in trouble
and when i was inside
it was the perfect place to hide
but not a perfect place to be

you see another girl who wants attention
you see another "glad it's not me"
you whisper to your friends how she's just overreacting
you could take it if you were her
but how can you say that when
my head is an oven and someone keeps turning up the heat
my eyes are faucets and someone doesn't care about the water bill
my skin is a flimsy sweater and i'm in antarctica
my ears are the static on the television in the middle of the storm
my hands are your 90-year-old grandmother trying to lift a bowling ball
my legs are the roadrunner on a treadmill
i'm trying to breathe but i'm underwater
i'm screaming for help but everyone's deaf
but you don't see that.
no, you won't even try to.
she's no longer human
she's a caged animal at the zoo
just a dog at the pageant, waiting to be judged
say what you want, someone was going to anyways
but remember
some people are like water balloons
they can only take so much before they burst

11:11
i showed it to you
you made a wish and i did too
my wish was for you and yours was for me
oh look how happy we seem
11:11
i cried because you weren't there
my wish was for you, you didn't care
it meant nothing to you but something to me
oh look how wrong i could be
11:11
i make my last wish
but don't hope for it to come true
because after months of the same wish,
i still don't see you

i turn off the light but that's not all
we haven't spoken since the fall
i close my eyes
i hear your lies
i toss and turn
the memories burn
my skin starts sweating
there's no forgetting
i stare at the ceiling
there is no concealing
my thoughts when i'm alone
i glance at the light from my phone
your name isn't on it
if it were, maybe i would quit
this sad habit of staying awake
it's hard to sleep when you're about to break
you get to sleep fine
but you interrupt mine
how much more can one person take?