Every day I wake up,

wishing that it never happened.

I used to scratch at my skin when I got anxious,
When I'd see you, I'd scratch away like I was ripping into my veins so you can access my heart without me saying a word.

Now I scratch at my skin to stop myself saying all of the things I want to say when I see you, and him, together.

I can't see for the life of me
Why there is a future ahead of me
Unless I have an epiphany
Or be the person I wish to be
Then I think I should simply, die.