I promised myself I'd address this with
you two but is been burdening me and messing with my head
so we go any further and before another day decides to pass
I'm going to write this down before I end up brain dead.
You're my parents, you birthed me and I love and respect you both
but the pressure you put me under is causing me to choke
I don't know how much longer I can take living under this yoke

First off and with all due respect,
I'm not my siblings or my cousins, and I know I'm not what you must've guessed
would arrive on this earth, and I know you do and have done your best
to raise me right, but I see that's one thing you forget.

Second, please pick a consistent tone.
I want to grow up but clearly you don't want me on my own.
I know I'll always be that curly headed little kid, and I'm trying to grow up but there's only so much I can do no matter what either of you did.

Thirdly, mom, I have trouble sleeping at night because of all of this, so when I do wake you up I am sorry it's nervous energy that causes it.
I keep trying to sleep then wonder
Will I ever get my life together or am I just another burden another life ripped asunder?

I hate that I even had to write this but I had to get this off of my chest,
I know you both love me and want nothing but the best,
but I couldn't find a way to communicate these problems I'm facing without coming off as issuing disrespect.
so if I'm you're biggest disappointment I'm sorry, that's just maybe what I'm destined to be,
I know that I'm not in charge of my destiny,
but I am glad that God assigned you two to me

"I wanted to touch your hair..."

"why?"

It was just...

your cheek seemed,
so sad,

without my hand.

I know the pain you feel is deep,
your want from life is simple peace.
And though I cannot guarantee,
please listen closely, as I speak.

Presently you stroll alone,
searching for a hand to hold.
You feel your sorrow in your bones,
in harshest sun, you still feel cold.

Pre - dawn, however, is darkest night
that must be followed by morning light.
I pray you won't give up the fight,
the universe will set things right.

I know at times, it seems unclear
that happiness is always near.
But wholly I believe my dear,
someday soon, you'll find some cheer.

Don't you hate staying up late
When you're all alone
With your thoughts
And your regrets
And you don't have anything to drink
Or anything to smoke
So you just sit there
Laying on your back
Feeling the stray tears
Slide down the sides of your cheeks
And into your ears