who knows anything anymore?
who cares?
i called it a saga, drama, crazy week
three confessions at the same time
who knew?
who cared?
who liked me enough to say it?
what am i even doing now?

I hate you.
Sometimes you’re funny, in a stupid way.
Most of the time? You’re not.
Please die in a hole.
You don’t want to? Ok.
You can die in a box instead.
Drink candle wax.
Eat superglue.
Please go away.

(Just so I don’t get in trouble I actually don’t want dumb person to die, I just don’t like them lol)

victory is so nice
i should win more often

my heart hurts
i see the skyscrapers and then the empty roads
glistening in the falling light, a wondrous gold
painting and paining my soul

why can't i be free like that? why can't i
run along the road like those lucky characters
who have parents overseas and perfectly shaped knees
and the eyes of an artist's hands that shaped and colored
them just so?

i want to be free. i want to go outside. i want to be like them. i want to fall in love and get my heart broken and then shake it off and and run through an empty park at sunset without worrying about my parents and go to school and live and laugh and just breathe

when will i do that?
maybe in high school? or college? or the distant lands of the future beyond?

i hope i can do that.

it sounds like the bass
it feel so new
yet so familiar
like running shoes molded
to one's feet

the water that ran down those pipes,
the pipes that are now dry,
it hasn't been there for a while.

there's an empty space above my head.
honestly,
thank you.

the shivers are gone.
thank you so much,
for leaving.

the sky was blue
birds that looked like
strokes of black ink
painted their way through the air,
the golden sun glinting off of their inky brushstroke wings
proud and defiant
like a person who knows their mind

i laid on the deck, face-up
camera in hand
trying to capture
these fleeting beings of freedom
only for the paint to drip too fast
ending up blurred in the lens,
but those golden glints,
snapped and stored away forever