youcancallmesierra

youcancallmesierra Jun 20

play your broken record
if it makes you feel better
make love to your favorite lie
enjoy it if just for the night
before the sound of joy crashes
and we're sweeping up ashes
make yourself comfortable in the world you forged
before it crumbles away and there's nothing left to morph

the pictures behind your eyes
words that wet tight stitched lips
a boundless universe inside your closed off mind
when will it finally be worth the risk

if you say yes
if you say no
it won't change what happens in the end
maybe let what's never been said out
and don't be afraid to sound pitiful
that's the human experience baby

youcancallmesierra Jun 20

stages of relief

the universe must have some sort of humiliation kink
all these stupid ******* things keep happening to me
shouldn't let it knock me over but it's a lot to conceive
so much to do and fix and be
but i'm so tired of being angry
of hating everything that hates me
fighting things they cannot see
to keep the castle from crumbling

but **** the castle
and the walls they want
i'm bare on this altar
and ready to bleed
the only reason i hurt
is because i care for you
and when i don't want it anymore
you cannot keep me here
when it isn't worth it
i charge forward
you cannot hurt me anymore
this is what they mean
when they say
forgiveness is for yourself
you dont know me anymore
and that's gonna eat away at you until you die
maybe that's just enough for me

Jun 20

My Dear Poet

My old shoe

my old shoe carries me
through walks of life
the dirt, dust and poo
through to the end
and if my shoe can do
then how much the more
you too, can too
my friend

#friendship #life #shoe

youcancallmesierra Jun 20

i feel different today

hot wind blows through my hair
i was angry before i didn't care
the circumstances left me bare
and i just had to leave it there
my hopes and dreams for us two
all the love i had for you
fades from black and blue
i'm experiencing something new
more surreal and vivid than i ever have
i wished that you had had my back
but now i never want what we had back
why would i settle for that
when i see something brighter on the horizon
my energy as a whole has brightened
the burden of nurturing others lightened
fresh and free and so excited
each day that passes makes it further away
flowers blooming on a months old grave
i'd never have known if i had stayed
i dont wanna sleep anymore days away

finally
i want to be awake for this next part
the future is almost

in a good way

youcancallmesierra Jun 13

wipe those dry tears over someone else's grave

i don't want no party
bury me alive
swallow your sorries
and finally do something right
it's too late to care
what your actions can lead to
and it's too much to ask
for me to live for you
i kept all my promises
now i want to be free
you don't get to
take this away from me
i don't want no ******* party
incineration is fine by me
if you feel like you should've been nicer
you won't get cry to me
one last time for mercy
my absence won't set you free
if you feel like you should've thought twice
before you murdered me
with your lack of thought and love
maybe you should have
it's funny when its gone
that you finally want it back

the motto must be
miss you when you're dead
mistreat you while you're here

youcancallmesierra Jun 13

you found out through the newspaper and i guess i'd be sorry if i was still alive to do so

i'm not where i was
when i last closed my eyes
wiping away the blur
letting the figures materialize
reality sets it in
the aches crawling under my skin
scatter under harsh light
but they're still eating away at me
what more could i want
butican'thaveyou
why can't i have you
whydoiloveyou
why cant i see you anymore
whycan'tiholdyou
why can't i kiss you
whycan'tiloveyouanymore
why can't i miss you

cause i do
and i always will
til the day that i die
and i was holding out for something
but i'm not seeing the light no more
as i'm closing up shop
and putting the last of it away
will you accept this token of my love
or will you spit in my face

if i try to say goodbye
though i guess i know the answer
it's hard to leave with nothing
and my feet and my hands hurt
though they've gotten me this far
but i think i'm ready to go to bed
so kiss my grey lips
and forgive me for the rest
of what's about to happen