I was once bullied
They didn't like me speak English
They imagined me to be arrogant.
They forced me into a hall
where poetry competition was on.
My first one ever.
They thought I would have an awakening
and stop speaking in English in the campus.
But I won that time
for the best poem of the year
I remember them vividly
with gratitude of course.

I have been clueless
for so many years
what do I even want to do
I really don't know.
It is my very own
customised black hole.
Somebody
Something
please get me out of here.

The acne breakout was too much to bear
Pain and disgust at self filled my thoughts.
Stood by the fruits aisle
need to get on a fruit diet, so.
Picked each kind
like an elegant queen.
I'm on a fruit diet you see.
Then, he came.
I sensed his heat and turned to look.
Worn down shirt, torn down pants
dusty feet, trembling hands.
Picked one pear and paced away.
Just a pear
I saw the emptiness in me
Quietly left the aisle in shame.

I first knock at your door
To see if this really is it
To find a meaning to my life
I wonder if you really are the one
Deep down I wish it is you
But right above it, there is a storm
Fear, anxiety and despair in a swirl
Only if you could open this door for me
could I really reach out
To the limitless universe of words
Words were always my best friends
And once I see you on the other side,
I will say, "Hello Poetry, I am home".

I am 30 already
I should have read more
so I could be intelligent
so I could pen wise words
so I could feel real
so I could look bright
so I could be ready