There were days when we would grasp our pencils
as if they were the cause of all our troubles,
when really they were the only things that were a constant.
There were moments when we looked too far forward,
and we missed things that were right in front of us,
when we pined for those we had not yet lost—
moments that made us question ourselves, our choices, our futures.

Maybe we do say the wrong things,
and maybe we think we know the answers,
but there is no space between the lines we carve ourselves
unless we fall asleep too early
or we decide to go out for food instead of writing down our futures in pen.

For some of us,
there has been time to learn how to say sorry
or to tell someone that we love them.
Others have watched and waited to hear these very words.
There have been days when we look in the mirror and we don’t see ourselves,
but at least we recognize some variation of who we are.

It is there, in these
moments which feel like they should be more meaningful,
that the secrets we are too fearful
to speak are hiding:
                We’re afraid that we’ll miss each other,
                but we’re terrified of letting go.

I broke the beer bottle
as a metaphor for my emotions--
                     the realization she was leaving setting in.
There was nothing romantic between us.
Just a friendship--
two people, sharing
dead seal dark humor
& common hatred of being idle.
She stayed in the hospital with me
after someone added something "special" to my drink.
We'd only met five hours prior.

You can't find that type of karmic green kindness
laying idly on a sidewalk or in the mall.
If only she weren't such an uppity *****--
I'd miss her even more.

I'd be at her goodbye party
right now, sharing bourbons
and yucking it up.
But she makes me feel
so ******* uneasy--
hence, I'm staying here,
drinking craft beer and honoring
her friendship by a pouring one out.

I don't think I understand the concept of forevers and goodbyes. I just can't wrap my mind around the idea of lasts.

All week I've been dreading friday.
Because I know you're leaving.
Part of me is happy.
You're going to do and see great things.
It's time for a new chapter in life.
But the other part of me is beyond sad.
Because, what if i never see you again?
And what if I can't see you before you leave?
The thought of that breaks my heart.
You mean so much to mean and you always will.
I love you.
And I am forever changed my who you are and the friendship you have blessed me with.

It's not as if I've never seen you cry before
I have, so many times.
And though each time I felt sad,
This time it hurt.
You were always the strong one,
The one who didn't think, just did.
I guess I just had you up on this pedestal.
But the knowledge that you're scared,
That you're struggling,
It terrifies me to the core.
I needed to see you do it with ease,
As you've done everything else life has thrown
I needed to see you loving it:
This newfound, independent life.
Because then, I at least had a chance.
If it scares you,
What am I going to do?
How will I be able to cope?
And every day it gets a little bit closer
Every day I get a little bit more scared.
It's a part of life,  I know.
I'm going to have to do it someday, I know.
It'll be good for me, I know.
But am I ready?
I'm not so sure.

This is my brother
He’s smart, nice, and keen
If art took him
He’d create a pretty scene
If music he did take part
He’d compose to touch a heart
If writing was his way at hand
His works would be finer than grand

But he did not choose these
He chose another path
One with a secret other half
Now with my brother
There is another
This is my monster

It’s mean, crass, and rude
In essence one ****** dude
It’ll cheat, hide, lie
It has made us all cry

Whenever it’s about
My feelings come rushing out
It makes me helpless
And then mad
Then guilty, and sad
But when I should rest
I feel is depressed.

As I lay at night awake
Thinking of what that thing partakes
A wandering question seeps through my mind
A question of the sinister kind
When will this monster die?

How can this come upon
The two people are the same guy
The monster I want gone…
Is my brother when he’s high.

Stay humble in everything you do.
Appreciate the ones who love you.
The journey to success is never easy.
Never be to proud to show love for those who helped you get your feet off the ground.
They are the honest and brutal ones. They tell you how it is, and they don't sugar coat anything.
They let you know when you are starting to act like you're entitled to everything.
You aren't entitled to anything. You have to work for it.
Be thankful for them, and keep in mind that there is a strong difference between success and fame.
Get over your ego, and remember to always be grateful.
-Lily P. McLaughlin-

I don't think our love could ever be rekindled because it's always so fleeting
These feelings and missing and wanting and loving and hoping for something
better to happen, but

I miss you like the grass misses the rain and the boy across the street misses his drugs and like my best friend misses the love she shared with a boy who couldn't figure himself out.

I miss you like the deaf miss music and blind miss sunsets
I miss your smile and your laugh and your hands and your hair,
even when I poke fun at it.
I wish I wasn't so harsh to you sometimes because really, I'm trying my best to be tough so I don't melt into your arms when I see you because
I'm that scared.

I miss arguing with you like a brother and talking with you like a counselor and loving you like you were the only one left.
Sometimes, I miss just talking to you. Just the sound of your voice or how you used to defend me and tell me you love me and you don't anymore.
You don't do any of that and you wonder why we don't go for coffee 24/7 anymore.
I miss going out for coffee, 24/7.
I miss everything that happened and I wish I could take it all back because I swear to God, if there was one person I felt was meant for me in this whole world,
it would be you.