sometimes,
late at night,
i worry

i worry
about little
(or, perhaps, big)
things
like if he suddenly
wakes up
one day
and realizes  
that i'm not good enough for him

that he could do so much better than just me
and that this
us
shouldn't be happening.

most of all,
i worry
that he will fall
in love with
someone new.

(someone,
who is not
me.)

Living is found in many shades. When we are sad it is said that we have the blues. A whole form of music was created to celebrate our sadness. When we are jealous we are said to be Green with envy. The colors of spring and Emeralds is associated with life's jealous side. When we are angry, it is said that we see Red. Which can also be called the color of passion. When a woman becomes a bride, she is dressed in white as a symbol of purity. In a persons vocation they are separated into blue and white, the colors of their collar denotes their work. In all things life is filled with color. If not for color, we would live in a bland and pointless world.

Hear the silver bells ring out. Hear their echo from building and mountainside. Hear the sound of children singing filled with joy and mirth. Listen to the whispering wind as it blows up newly fallen snow. Hear the sound of young couples hearts as they skate on a frozen pond and draw close together just to keep warm. Hear the sound of ice cracking on evergreen trees as they sway too and froe. Listen to jingle bells on a horse pulling a sleigh. Hear the crackling of a fire in a chimney not so far away. All wrapped up in coats and scarves, let are hearts immerse themselves in the winter song that has gone unheard too long.

All that I own is in a plastic garbage bag. I walk in the cold until I can find a place to sleep. Trash cans are often where I find my next meal. I find it hard to keep track of the day. I see joyful people going about their business. Shopping and having a good time. While I just blend into the background, unnoticed and left behind. I never wanted it to be like this, I once was like everyone else. I just lost my way and now I wander the streets, homeless for the holidays again.