sickle say sigh
****** stars of showers
diddly hum drum bye
bickering baths of twilight
talkatalkatalktalk
moongazing goons
chewing on chalk
hubba hubba

oh! the way that smoke lingers and sways in the cracks of the burning log

writhing in the void is good exercise
basking in existence is pure bliss

salty banana brain game
seratonin sunshine soup
neurotransmitter broth
shimmer shimmer
a neuron takin a ****

"I love you."
"I love you too!"
"I wanna give you the universe."
"We can share it. With everyone."

born of a broken
home, the boy never
learned he was born

in constant fear
he could only survive
the last thing he thought
was to live

he ran and hid
and never came out
unless it was for his life

he lied and cried
as he smiled and tried
to not let anyone notice

Wax poetic with me and
we'll nurture a new language.

We can speak in love together
while we wait for light of the dead star
to stop shining hatred on our faces.

I saw you in the forest
and I thought you were just another tree
but there's no such thing

one two, cut the apple
three four, eat the core
five six, get the fix
seven eight, it's too late
nine ten, not again
eleven twelve, break my pelvis
thirteen thirteen
six six six
three two
one zip

you sacred little ****, you
I love you so much

my hands don't even look familiar to me anymore
nothing does

A poem is born
and suddenly
I am grateful
for my misfortunes

wh-why why can't
you try...
why can't you try
to understand?
wh-wh-what's it
that's stopping you
f-from reaching out
and holding their hand?
what's stopping you
what's stopping you
from trying to feel
what they feel?

th-th-that may be
th-th-the only way
you'll get c-close

deny them
and deny yourself

I left the door ajar tonight, and
despite the spirits of the darkness
swirls of sunshine pour into my open sores

running your fingers through my hair
it is falling out in clumps
I'm actually surprised it's stayed this long
but I will be a naked mole rat soon

when will i stop thinking with my heart and loving with my mind

a true mystery of mighty depth
deep blue and green of infinite breadth
a single flame and a single breath
the brown of moss and damp soil

a chuckle and a smirk and a wink and a quirk
a kiss and a dance of the eyes
a nudge and a nuzzle a cuddly solved puzzle
I feel so alive with you

see uknown in your empty eyeball
your empty eyeball
fizzy fuzzy thoughts and a
blurred pattern of vomitrocious gradients
split in two split in three split in four
more pieces to the puzzle
solve it and you will die
abandon it and you will die
so be happy and sing
be merry and dance to your
friend's heartbeats
getting quicker
getting slower
with your friends
getting higher
getting lower
unpack your massive bag
zipper broken and spill it all
can't shut it now not anymore
pack a small one
and empty it often
water your plants
rearrange your molecules
every time you hit the sack
every time you lay yourself to rest
remember the smile of that stranger you spoke to
and forgot their name
wonderlover wanderlust
celestial body
stardust

One step forward
two steps back a sin
there's more firewood
for fireside saccharine
you understood now but
you really shouldn't could
in fireball frenzy fruits fryin
those fickle foosball fantasies
buying pickled paradigm
pipe dreams
war paint

Everyone's a different person
with every different person.

Fill the abyss with a kiss

They wanted to be able to feel a way that was familiar to them. Comfortable. And it did not have to feel good. They did not have to feel joy. Because joy was too fleeting. To them, joy was uncomfortable, because they could not control it. To them, joy was uncomfortable, because they knew it would soon be gone. But they could control their suffering. They could control their own despair. They could hurt themselves whenever they wanted to. They took solace in this. Finally, something consistent. A place to settle in. A cranny to hide within.
The world soared past them.

saccharine lullabies
sit in sweet putrescent seats
around my rotting bed

I lie weightless
in the heavy truth
of the piece off a broken tooth
twirling through the cosmos
after a missile fist made
my spit mist

stardust

She's a wounded surgeon.
She's not entirely broken,
There's something lodged
deep inside a dark crevice
of one of her ventricles.
She just needs a little work.

I heard another surgeon opened her up and lost a finger in there.
No one will help her now.

So she has to do it herself.
She thinks if she's numb enough
she'll be able to dig in there and rip it out.

But she'll go too far and
put herself completely under
and all she can do is lie there, catatonic.

A few times she's managed to stay awake,
but she's left bleeding, fumbling with a scalpel.

Deep down she knows
she's going to have to do this one wide awake.
And it's going to ******* hurt.  

But she needs to know if anyone cares enough about her.
Enough for her to even think she's worth her own effort.

Holding my breath,
I'm floating
up, up, and awaay
darkness beneath me
I break the surface
and take a deep breath
of sunshine as I wake up
and rise up
and then i've got some
time to exist in peace.

before I start focusing
before i start noticing...
before i start getting caught
getting caught in the thickets
caught in the thicket thoughts
thicket thoughts
thickets

so now I'm trying to savor that blurry time
'cause I like to walk that blurry line
between sleeping n' leaping
from keep to keep

because life is just one blurry line
...
between sleeps

__

I pour a line of salt onto a table
and it's dissipating around the edges
and you can see the surface beneath it that
rises up like a mountain range and
I'm rising out of the ocean like a *******
performing an interdimensional ion exchange
and I'm a surface rising out of a sea of salt
and I am an ocean rising
out of an ocean rising
out of a surface
of a surface...

waking up, up
and away

Our eyes are near
and my heart is hot
but your stare is cold —
a thousand miles away

Your words are clear
and time has stopped
there's nowhere to go
my thoughts are broken and blurred

Sweet lips, your sweet lips
Carry such a bitter sound...

I'm floating in place with
no lover to face

trembling, trembling
trembling heart space

I'm spinning in circles
looking for miracles

and it's proving to be
horribly difficult

Trying to fly
with no wings to spread

I crumble and cry
a song for what's dead

the sound of alarms
ring in my head

the sound of alarms
ring in my head...

I'm trying so hard
I don't know what to do

My heart is aching
thinking of you

A small square of paper
sits on my tongue

With razor sharp edges
and tasting of dung

It takes me to spaces
deep in my mind

Where there's too many places
and not enough time

I've been drowned in guilt
and I'm suspended in shame

Repeatedly killed
like in a video game

Written upon
the sharp paper square
are words for destruction
and guilt and despair

It's a trip like no other
you won't even feel high
you'll feel like a bother
and just want to cry

Drifting in place
dead in deep space

You left me here with
tears on my face

Crystalline droplets
scintillating pearls

spinning in circles,
spirals, and swirls

Why did you think
to leave me alone

at the cold ugly brink
a frost to the bone

the cold hard shoulder
feels far colder
than a lifeless boulder
I'm cold, I'm
cold

I speak with my music
and these notes are my words
My harp is my voice
and these strings are the cords

I try hard to play
But you've cut them all off
My harp is left bare
naked, unstrung

I'll move all the pedals
But unto what end?
I can't speak my heart
I can no longer pretend

It's time to stand up
and take a great bow
Walk off the stage
The end is —
.....

and
There is a silence
in the mist, hidden
between the little
droplets, whispering
rivers of soft words from
past lovers evaporated~
.....

together
we held hands
and in our palms
we held time

and we ran away
from the rising sun
so we could see it
rise forever

but we grew tired
and we slowed down
and the sun sped up
and time was slipping
between our fingers
dripping
from our knuckles

and together we ran
we ran away toward
the setting sun
as fast as we could
but we were too tired...

and
you showered me in
silky sheets of glowing lovelight
you embraced me with
warm rays of shimmering soulshine

you pushed and pulled my ocean's tides
in and out like a lilting melody
making love to a perfect harmony

but slowly you
drifted away
into space
to shine on new rocks
leaving me cold my
ocean waves
still...

and
For the longest time
I wanted to thank you, thief
for stealing my heart.

I thought it'd be better off
in someone else's hands anyway,
because I sure as hell
didn't take good care of it.

Can you tell me about the time
you carefully held it close?

because I'm sure
that you can remember that
because that's all you want
to remember.

It was your
little pet.

and I can't tell you
how much it meant to me
that you found it so
intriguing...

but I can't tell you
how much it hurt when
it stopped being something special
and started being
just another animal

Don't you remember
how much fun you
had with it?
Mm..

But you don't remember
watching it struggle
to breathe in
and out?

Because it seems like
despite that

all I can remember now
is your tightening grip
suffocating it
carelessly
and your acidic lip
spouting seemingly
ceaseless
abuse

Tell me about the time
you played with it
until it was broken
and it bored you

Because I can sure
remember that.
but can you?...

Oh!
Batshit crazy,
Batshit soup.
Am I just lazy,
or caught in a loop?

Batshit crazy,
Owl **** soup.
Razor blades,
Razor blades,
Razor blades,
****!

Love is not a competition,
Love is not a game!
You see me as a player,
and it's a downright shame!

Batshit crazy,
Owl **** soup!
I am totally lazy,
and caught in a loop-die-loop?!

Glass houses
Baseball games
Angels wings and tar
SEPTA lines and pine trees
Can take you pretty far

Love is not a competition,
Love is not a war!
and acting like a soldier
is really quite a chore!

Silly souls
Wacky words
Dragonflies and tar
I want to make some art with you
but I don't know how you are!

and
it's
Just another slide
down the razor blade
of life! into a bowl
of sour owl ****...

Batshit crazy,
Owl **** soup!

Am I crazy,
or am I caught
in a loop?

Razor blades
Razor blades
Razor blades
****!

and you are
ribbed, but uncaged, and
you read like a book broken,
with a cracked spine, snapped,
always opening to
the same page

the wrinkles stacked
dendritically, along the
ragged column, show
where you were split,
down the seam,
in a fervent attempt
to be figured out

your leaves are worn,
dog eared, and torn,
with words used, and
defiled

unadorned,
sickly souls

forlorn figures,
sitting silently

wishing and waiting,
no kissing or playing

it seems that you've left me,
and you're all I want to read...

blistering sunsets
burn my skin

I watch the ball of love
get further from me,
falling a w a y

It was always out of reach,
but I could feel it's warmth!
as long as it was in sight,
but, no longer

It forms rivers from dry wells.

In it's absence
it has them brimming,
now overflowing, down
channels of skinclay
wrinkles

they run deeper,
than the roots of
the tallest trees,
falling slower, than
the softest cries,
unheard

rocky river ways
froth from the mouth,
splashing and bubbling
in maniacal sadness —

silent white water rapids...

Tussled and unkempt,
shriveled livers beg for mercy!
hidden behind layers of rotting drywall

a rusty sledgehammer.

—unused

You may want to take me inside
but your mind is a million dripping daggers
perpendicular to the infinite edges
of my circular paradigms.

your cold soul wraps around me
like a chainmail suit.

I want to love it, as
it's supposed to love me, but
it's heavy and pinches every fiber
of my existence

and why should I wear it
when I want to run into love
completely naked?

My name is derived from Tyrant
I would say you should have expected it
but I am not one to take someone's heart
that is the ultimate crime.

Can't you see that you've stolen your own?
Look in the mirror! Unfurl your ****** fists.

Now my fingers are ablaze with hellfire!

and
My unseen tears
condense onto windowpanes
as they're smashed open by codependent assumptions.

Blinding
blunt force flashlights
shatter sharp shards of light
across the darkest crevices
of my soul.

Impatience
and uncertainty
leads to reactionary behavior.

Do not plant flowers
in the gardens of someone
who cannot take care of their
own plants.

Their soil is unsaturated
with nutrients.

How can you expect to enjoy the fruit of their love?

I am a withered plot.
I am the dead of winter.

No one is interested in how it has died.
They are only upset that they can no longer feed themselves.

What you see is what you get.

fuzzy buzzy flickering light fixtures
court me for days -
tired, unlatched
and in a daze

broken hinges hang from
untapped doorways,
painted with
shattered looking glasses
and laces overthrowing
unseen faces
crawling at ungodly paces,

blind red rages boil over
onto sentient pages to die
on unlit stages,
reeking with rows
of rotting audiences,
decomposing millions of
masterpieces.

sleepless death
undertaken,
like a sorry soul,
to a hole new level
six breaths under

reborn into a dogs tail
clenched between
it's own teeth.

destroyer of the void
I am glass shattered sun
scattered high beams

leaping from one black hole to another

I am finding nothing but the light within my soul bent into empty caves empty caves abyss forever
keep spitting

you're mine forever
chain link and snap

seratonin is an inhibitory neurotransmitter

happiness means
less neural activity

stop thinking, brain
stop it, please

but I will know joy from suffering
so I will know bliss from despair

**** me **** me I want to feel alive
train wreck train wreck

someone
pull me out of the
hole of *** the
hole of gender the
hole of identity

it is raining

my words drip along with the raindrops as the sides of this meatbucket crumple inward

plastics melting and
canvas fibres disconnected

i am frayed eye lash
eye lash pull scream and

eyes twisted in shapes unseen
body convulse and and convulse in
I'm confused why am I here

take me away from
this body
this now

losing my eyes would help everyone else

I awoke, my consciousness
still slowly coalescing from the astral plane.

In a cloud of dissipated thoughts and confusion, I retrieved my mug of icy black water medicine I had prepared for this occasion the night before.

The alluring smell of dark Panamanian roast began to pull the remainder of my consciousness into the waking realm.

Suddenly,
the mug was empty,
and I was fully aware.

cracks in
the surface
spiderweb crisscross
across the frozen eyelid
of the lake

cracks in
the surface
split dendritically
across the ragged planes
of my arctic fingers

capped with
weather-worn callouses

swimming through
my thick hair frosted
with sun drop water crystals
and dry winter dandruff

snowflake scalp fluff
finger fly skin flurries
and I'm a coldfront

I'm a thunderhead
icicle snowdrift
I'm a rolling cloud
ice gale moonmist

trekkin through the
frosted forest with

fairy dusted
smiles and
snow filled
mittens

I'm a
fickleberry
tick tack
pick pack
**** it like a
smoke stack and
poke it with a
thumbtack
through the front
and out the back
and swan dive
into the cork board

leave it for another day
move on forward but
don't forget to stop
and pray

tongue tied
in a knot today
like a cherry stem
tongue tried
quite a lot, I say

to carry them
ever-powerful silly
magic mouth sounds

I went for a walk today.

they're colliding —
coming together and dancing,
breathing with one another

their bodies, magnetic —
orbiting slower than photons
perceive us to be moving

— at the infinite speed of love —
spiraling into one another:

an interaction as primal
as celestial bodies taking shape —

...amorphous shimmers of light
frolicking on the surface of a happy lake
rippling in sync with its intentions...

From these throats come
undulating warmth, as misty as
the sighs of trees in the brisk morning —

wisps of transparent cotton,
lilting in the breeze —

motions uncurling into actuality

thoughts unfurling on the forest floor

...a fern reaches for a piece of the sky
dripping from the branches above —

tendrils of starscapes opening
as a book read by the wind...

a trillion crystal orbs —
suspended off the ground,
aglow with golden sunlight:

the presence welcome

there are lightning rivers running from the mountains
tree tops swinging menacingly atop the scalp of a human
moss tangled in toes there are flowers singing with the clouds

in the unfathomed depths of an eyeball we see the vast expanse of space
pulled eyebrows and eyelashes on the desk by the blank notepad
unkempt fury pressurized in thin glass bottles

look at this unfamiliar air between us
look at this forced civility

where have the nests been dispersed
when was the last straw that twisted your neck
bit your ear and tickled your toes

the green apple appears red in the periphery
look closer because there is truth in the mud

a blue lotus
ever blossoming
a belch of the marsh

who are the ones that observe these thoughts
who is the one that chooses them
every moment a different person
never the same
the past and the future are here to stay

everything is now
don't sell yourself short
disconnected appendages
a ghost within a shell
a high strung harp

sugarsand whiskey pit
blackberry blossom
warped wood

The energy that is our life is water.
We are all intelligent, emotional, informational rivers of energy.

When we die
our energy evaporates,
dissipating to return to the source,
an infinite ocean.

When we are born
the droplets of consciousness coalesce
to form a concentrated
pool of life.

interlacing faces
dilate pupils as
fingers intertwine
between synchronized paces,
cold walks and kind smiles

I feel a tremble coming on and warm shimmery bubbles radiate right through me as electric caresses and magical messages cause goosebumps to rise like mountain ranges on celestial bodies

I like you, you
mystical water gazelle

you swing sweetly
the tides of my seas
and sing softly the
stars of my skies

We are all God
We are All
We Are
We

We're two envelopes!

We're two envelopes
and we're on our way
homeward and we're
two envelopes
endlessly enveloping
one another!

We're two letters!

We're two letters
and a trillion words
unspoken and we're
two letters
endlessly opening
one another!

We're
two pages!

Two pages
kissing the same
pen and we're
two pens!

Two pens
kissing the same
page and we're
two pens!

We're two pens!

Two and One

It's a planetary whirlwind in
a stellar vortex find us all spinnin'.

There's some that seem stagnant
see 'em flappin' against the
strong solar winds.

Yawn yawn and
I am drizzling on a cloud
from the moon.

Slightly sideways
soak it up, fluffy buffoon.

Stuff my belly with
unmasticated dreamscapes.

Feeling indigestion from
the lack of gestation.

Sprouting so quickly
I am shooting topsoil out
in every direction, an herbal volcano

See me twisting to find the light.
Seems like it's almost too bright.
Packed dirt almost too tight.

Break free break free to see
the world around me.

Channel the sea to
surf the waves of energy.

I look for you
in the darkness
of my shadow
and rain drops
are dripping from
my closed curtains.
I can't see anything.

All I find is myself
and the terrible truth
of who I am.

We were scared of
each other at first.
But then we recognized
ourselves in our eyes.
We sat there in silence,
and our pupils dilated to
the edges of our eyes
as we strained to see
into one another.

I was hoping
it wasn't as ugly
on the inside.

Your skin is burned
and blackened, rough
and calloused, scattered
with sweltering welts
spitting seemingly
ceaseless smoke from
their cancerous mouths.

But in my shadow
we've been turned inside out.
What we see is inside us.

I held you in my arms,
covered in pus and bile.
What happened to us?!
I wailed over you and
my snot and tears
healed your wounds.

Whirrr
whirrrrrr
whirrrrrrrrr

The difference in the frequency the tone that the two lightbulbs in my room resonate at is approximately 3Hz. Whirwhirwhir
Whirwhirwhir

Out of sync
Out of sync
Out of sync

The dissonance is pulsating around the room, bouncing off of and into every surface therein. Wuhwuhwuh and my ears hear my ears hear my ears hear it at about three times per second. Wuhwuhwuhwhat were you saying? I'm sorry I'm sorry the lights in my room are out of tune. The lights in my room are out of tune. The lights in my room are off.
What were you saying?

I've noticed I've been really stuck in a whirlpool whirlpool whirlpool spin around spin around same thing something different swinggg down the riverside and I'm a stone thrown and I'm a hop skip and a jump and I'm a splish splash bubble dance go for a spin and take a chance always flying by the seat of my pants! dance! dance! dance! I 'got ants in ma pants! ants in ma pants!

atop of your mirror
the sinister sound
of crystalline powder,
whispers maniacal cackles
as it's crushed, crackled beneath
the apathetic plastic card,
somehow sensual

your identity, face down -
grinning

rub it in soft circles
on your favorite reflection

'Which one of your nostrils
is more open to this
sort of thing?'

the frightened boy fumbles
for his devil's dollar bill,
it's a fascist nose-nozzle
vice-vacuum,
poison-sourdough
death-demon

breathe in your
shattered fiberglass fix,
****'s as cool as ice-cold *****,
stings like a frost-bitten *****

snort, shiver -
twitch!

All year long the sun has strived,
to bring its light to life.

To rise and fall every single day,
through harmony and strife.

Through the Spring and return to life,
seeds are planted, grown, and nurtured.
Through the Summer and fruition,
fruits are plucked, prepared, and eaten.
Through the Autumn and return to death.
Plants are turned into the soil,

a returning to the source.

The Sun and Earth
Swing in celestial dance
a motion of merry mirth

From life to death
and death to life
a cycle of rebirth

How our legs are weary now
Our roots take nothing in
We sink into the soil now
Spinning with goofy grins
(I'm dizzy!)

Cradled by the mother
In the arms of darkness
The sun is still in silence,
in tranquility at rest

With a loving embrace
to heal the weary Sol,
we breathe out
in cosmic balance.

The night is at its longest.

The sun emerges
from the hug of darkness
and we breathe in the light
expanding within and throughout

The sun is returned!

Midwinter is here!
Midwinter is here!

Solstice wisdom,
spirit and cheer!

Spirits of mirth
Welcome here!

Spirits of mirth
Welcome here!

We are the rising sun!
We are the change!
We are the ones
we are waiting for!
and we are dawning...
We are the rising sun!
We are the change!
We are the ones
we are waiting for!
and we are dawning...
We are the rising sun!

barren forest goddess

the white wind is running with
the sighs of saplings

foreign spores swirl
in spirals of springtime

dancing planets sparkle in
bursts of faerie dust and
the veins are crackling with
the life of lightning bolts as
rivers bubble over with laughter

cries of newborns overlap
giggles of dying dying and
the utmost amount of trying
is crumble dry leaf soil smile

white birch bird perch
tweet tweet whistle

blinding bright white crystals
fall slightly sideways

quartz unclouded
in a moment of clarity
I'm overtaken by electricity
crackle crackle jolt

a lightning bolt
from the tips of my fingers
traveling up my arms and
sizzling out in my elbows
my joints my joints

I am found unfinding
unfound and finding
myself losing myself
lost and found

tingly tongue tied with
sizzly pop sizzle spit
electric electric  

along the same line
I follow stories from
book to book I look
I swing I bring my own

back and forth from
word to word we see lines
cut from crystalline letters

round and round
crush crackle jolt

tell me something new
tell me something new
tell me something new

Oh, love!
Love, fly
fly FLY with me!
FLY with me to and from the
bright glow moonie moon!

Let's laugh, shine and play! amongst the
luminous spheres of plasma holding
themselves together with their own gravity!

That's love, love, that's us, love!
Let's do a celestial swing!

Let's see what we can bring!
Let's see what love can bring
to our galactic orbital ion ring and
we don't need a diamond ring, we' got
suspended particulates flying around us
at a million lightyears per second and
we're just photons photons!
We're light dancing!

Let's see the cool breeze chancing
Let's taste the sunshine prancing on
planets we've never been to before!

Glowing dots
connect the dots and it's an
intricate lace let's interlace our fingers
let's brush our fingers fingertips paintbrush
paintbrush painting tactile tickle brushstrokes
brushstrokes oh, heart, love, kiss me! kiss me!

My heart is filled
with melodic lines dancing in counterpoint and
each tone is a universe coming to fruition
and returning to the soil for nutrition and
it nurtures and it nurtures and it's new,
it's always new! it's always now! and
I wanna sing!

I wanna sing forever!
I wanna sing forever evermore
and I wanna sing forever everNow!

always all ways
all ways always
I Love You!

were my anchor to reality
but you broke the chain
and left me drifting
into the storm

You are, and you're not.
You are a circle, and you're a dot!

I'm not afraid of losing you,
because I never had you in the first place.

I'm afraid of losing what I feel with you.

use rugs and ****
yeah or animals
or the scalps of white men
feels good beneath your toes

in The way trees reach
The way they are growing
To bring life to the skies
The way our veins pump
The way they are flowing
To bring life to these eyes
The way rivers flow
The way they are going
To bring life —
You can see their intention
in their way