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168 · Dec 2018
THE FEELING ABOUT FEELING
Farhan Ahmed Dec 2018
From the beginning of its arrival
To the end of every recycle
It is a tale through recital
Of the battle of revival

Vintage, Classic, we may call it historical
or Savage, updated or call it technological

Still, it will be called a feeling
Either wounded, or when its healing
Beautiful, decorated
Strong, faded
Its bad, its sad
Satisfaction, you're glad
Destruction, you're mad

Tears you in pieces while it teaches when it reaches and it seizes your moments as it breaches then it stitches everything back

Fear to recover to discover facts to never miss knowledge forever loose the lover to ever come back

And yet to cry, to lie, to die, deny the why
And to loose, to live, to give, to take, to make, to find, to bind

'Nothing'
is a feeling, unless otherwise any stronger reason for appealing?

Well??
Is there a way of concealing
the fact
'there is no moment without a feeling'
159 · Nov 2018
A dreams END
Farhan Ahmed Nov 2018
I mess with the paint, make a random art
And I was standing broken apart
I love her because, I knew I brush it right
But how bad colorless colors could be?
She isnt the right one, there for me
Deep inside, in the dark corners
I see the pain,  I delivered
I push her out, aint no worth dying
Where she will stay for a while....crying
And beyond reach across the street
She walks towards me
Whispering a few words, not waiting too long
And when i know she steered out of the song
I go back to sleep
155 · Nov 2018
The Expression
Farhan Ahmed Nov 2018
Sometimes the wordplay
becomes too easy
Because for once to say
Desirably choosy
As the expressions are repeated
So does the sentiments
Papers are thrown or words deleted
So are the statements

Eyes closed, the requested wish is
listen to symphony
A vice host, but represents the pieces of harmony
151 · Dec 2018
SHALL THEE BE.... INFINITE
Farhan Ahmed Dec 2018
Shall thee be raindrops, battling to the ground
Shall thee be paws, steps with no sound
Shall thee be hope, to live or to survive
Shall thee be power, that all thrive
Shall thee be thankful, God sent to be
Shall thee be future, all wish to see
Shall thee be light, darkness fears
Shall thee be eyes, no tears
Shall thee be flies, with fire in the night
Shall thee be color, but only white
Shall thee be emotion, of only love
Shall thee be words, missing 'hate'
Shall thee be trees, rising above
Shall thee be roads, with an unlocked gate
Shall thee be now or then, be the same
Shall thy identify or do you have a name?
To all who simply inspire the beauty of life and living
140 · Nov 2018
FINAL DESTINATION
Farhan Ahmed Nov 2018
You shall achieve miles, and miles to go
No matter how far may take these feet
One thing you must know
Dust and sand, we finally meet
133 · Nov 2018
The Message in a Bottle
Farhan Ahmed Nov 2018
I sit here by the empty shore,
Sing along the tide for some more
For an adventure from this shipwreck
Though luck is stuck up my neck
Float! Float! please find the one who
Who shall read and share a thing or two
133 · Jan 2019
Untitled
Farhan Ahmed Jan 2019
I said..

Look at the person who reads a strangers book
He wants to know the character but avoids recognition
115 · Nov 2018
ME & I
Farhan Ahmed Nov 2018
Conscious, that is he
And then there is me
Both within, within thee
Failing to clearly see

Confessions are Illustrated
Speech steered
Though, to he, all is feared
For truth is shot, and lashes of facts
And no cover with selfless acts
He produces and introduces thee
The versions of me
The ones insvisible like he

Innocence, that is he
Aware of all the sins

But protected in a shadow
It too has its cost
Because the roof has been lost
Somewhere in a meadow
In tiny wars of life deep into sand
Where it ends to begin again and
The ocean of darkness is dead
94 · Jun 11
Why are we here?
Farhan Ahmed Jun 11
Ten years.
And here we are.
Full circle.
Older.
Tired.

I left.
I built the house.
The ring. The vows.
Six years tied tight—
cribs, birthdays, broken sleep.

And you—
you stayed.
Alone in the city I escaped.
Same crowd and buzz,
same silence
I once called freedom.

I ran.
I chose.
And now I stand here
in front of you
as if none of that happened.
As if the knot on my finger
is loose in the dark.

What are we doing?
Why are we here?
Two people who let go—
one to drown in duty,
one to float in drift—
meeting again like the world forgot
we finished this.

You look the same like I was time travelling
I grew twice my years
maybe just wanting
to know why it still stirs.
Why the thread pulls
even now.

Is this memory?
Regret?
Loneliness?
Or the sharp, quiet ache
of what was never done?

We are older.
But not past it.
Not beyond the question:

Why?
0 · Jun 20
Fading Distance
Farhan Ahmed Jun 20
Did you wake up?

I was thinking...
we have been cuddling each other from different spaces,
from different distances,
and we do not speak.

Just feel the warmth of our bodies,
in a sense that we just need each other.
We do not need the brains.
We do not need the feelings.
We don't even need the greetings.

We don't talk all day,
we don't talk all night.
Only when it's needed.
Only when we need something from each other.

And time has passed.
It has been years.

Wondering what made us come close.
Even the ask for *** is not there anymore.
But we just want to make sure
that we continue to see each other in front of us.

It's just like a mirror.
It's just like a sesame.
It's just like a sense of presence that is required.

That is where we find peace.
So that the heart is not broken.
One breaks at the other.
It's confusing.

We've had a lot of questions to ask.
We ask each other—
What's going on?
What happened?
What can we do?
What have we done so far in these years?
How have we survived each other?

And once we were done with the questions,
now we don't ask anymore—
Why?

Why do we still argue?
Why have we not lost connection?
Why have we not lost access or address for each other?
What is it?
Is it that we're looking for closure?

The acceptance is not there now.
We are busy with priorities,
life calamities—
some including us,
some excluding us.

And some thoughts intruding,
blocking an overview.

We have never made this far—
it's a thought that I sometimes wonder.

But I still feel,
or I felt,
or I thought—
whatever you name it—
that it might be necessary
for the heart,
or for the brain,
or for time
to go through with it.

Go through with it,
and see how far we've come.

And also because the mistakes I made
through the journey without you—
maybe I would have never done,
or I would have never taken those steps.

You might have just tolerated me,
but still—
I would have felt protected,
because you dominated my feelings,
and that's what I needed at that moment.

But I failed.
I failed to understand me.
I failed to understand everything around me.
I needed patience.
I had to just take care of being anxious.

Well, I'll go now.
It's not good.

And I see that you are sleeping without expression,
so you might not be dreaming at the moment—
but likely, you've been tired.

Tired long enough
that your body forced you to go to sleep.

But you continue to spend nights awake,
worrying about your feelings.

Not worrying about someone else,
but just worrying about your feelings,
thinking—
how can I protect and savor myself from being vulnerable?

And that is making you stronger.
That is making you ruthless.

Know that there is no other choice
but to create a thick skin,
a boundary,
let go of me—
even though I'm just skin to skin with you.

Because I just don't exist beyond the dreams anymore.

It's likely that you're done with your questions.
You're done with the confusion that you already had.
And that has made you understand
that you had nothing to do with the break.

And we're done asking what is at stake.

I've taken other responsibilities,
which I accept—
you go through with your life.

I'm not thinking about the people that you love,
but just probably surviving,
wondering about the people that love you.

And I'm grateful to them,
and grateful that being around you
has been more important.

Maybe that is all there is now
It is all there!

— The End —