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Elle Jun 2019
I sway with the trees through my window
Ivy climbs up the bark
I play with the leaves through my window
A wind gusts through the night

Branches pick me up and play with my curls
They giggle and set me down
The trees have taken me from my window
Soot and sap covers my gown

I look back up at my window
The ivy has shallowed my room
Their leaves and poison look down through my window
Singing their gleeful tunes

I try to climb back to my window
The forest plants me in the ground
I sway with the trees staring up at my window
My window... my window...
Elle May 2019
Soft spoken and cloudy
You remind me of a dream I've been trying to forget
A dream that begs to be remembered
That pounded its iron fists on my collapsed chest
And yet you flutter and glide amid the space where flesh used to be
Gently and quietly you pass
I try not to hold it against you
But the resemblance is too striking
The sunlight beamed off of your hair
Before the rot began
Elle Aug 2020
There was a dream in depth
That rose only where you were
A place where spring grew louder
A place where winter blurred

The dream was of an amber glow
And all of our demons lay slain
You held me deep within you
With all the others you have maimed

There was a dark blue sky
That grew darker by the day
It might have only been in my mind
This sky that’d be black someday

Closing my eyes and I imagine
That place where we would stay
You held me in your broken arms
And told me it would be okay
Elle May 2019
The storm howled and growled and demanded to disperse pieces of us across the horizon. It felt like the last breezes from the Garden of Eden.

Suddenly, I was grinded into dust and you were melted into rain.
As I fell, I learned to feel. It felt like a life all at once.

My dust was everywhere and I was the dust.
The storm shoved me in all different directions but I was still whole.

I touched the ground.

I now know the wind as if he were my own lungs.
I know the sun as if she were my hands.
Know the ocean as if it were my own tears
And know your rain as if you were my own soul.

But I still miss you.

Now whenever it rains, I feel it again, the feeling of learning to feel.
I soak you up. I can't tell the difference between you and me.
It's messy and we turn into mud but we bask in it.

Once the sun comes again, I feel you evaporate from me.
I hold onto you until it feels like a drought.
I've always wondered what it feels like for you to rise back up to the clouds.

After a few of your rainy days, I hear the echo of muffled words.
A few more, I feel the bluest of blue poems tearing through me, towards the sun.

Day after day, it blooms and rises closer to the clouds, your home.
And when you fall, I feel the petals open just a bit more.

As the blue sinks its roots into me, I weaken.
You seem to be falling less and less, only dripping to make a sound.

Although we no longer have the words, the words we use are as if they are spoken from the lips of God.

I hear the howling and growling again.

What was I before the storm?
Elle May 2019
Early between the dawn and sunrise
A house within the woods
Ancient creaking floorboards
Stilted brotherhoods
A sparrow begins its song of shade
A mahogany table chipping dried blood
A faint and resonant snoring
A day before the flood
Elle May 2019
I've lost my name far away amongst the trees.
It's intertwined with the thorns and poison.
The hazy purple moonlight that was once coated in plastic and paper, whose name I struggled to remember, now watches every movement and tells its friends of my mistakes.
That moonlight that was once deliciously hushed and tranquil becomes vaguely unnerving. I pray for it to rush into a sunrise so I can retrieve my name
A name that belongs only to me
A name that will tell them who I am
Elle May 2019
Far from the shoreline
There was a moment your hand was in mine
My mind is weighed down by the thought of it
I bear an untouched story
A story of emerald that longed to be scarlet
A story of fire that thirsts for rain
My hand can hardly write of it
I close my eyes and hear an echoing of the sweetest song
A song that belongs to another world
A world where emerald turns to scarlet
And fire has its fill of rain
Elle May 2019
When you showed yourself to me, you expected fog to fall upon your shoulders, to disembody your definition.
As I was lolled into slumber, the sun shone upon your snowy bones. And the soil on which I laid threatened to rise me skyward on the back of silver grass and swaying wind.
You kept me anchored to a tree that smelled of jasmine and moonlight. You led my eyes once again to your skin which was flashing recognition. There, in the space around me- the song of a sparrow, a garden, a weeping and a whisper.
I went down, down, down into the fire.
I floated into the golden light and chose the snow that rested between them.
Elle May 2019
I felt a poem within me that desperately clawed at my throat
But each word dissipated as I opened my mouth to speak.
Elle Oct 2022
I cannot go on hanging in the suspension between Earth and sky -
caught in the perpetual pull of dark stars
and drawn back down again into the twisting roots of the Earth
I'm laid out, **** between them
soaking with rainwater and scorched by the swelling moon
The wind shivers and daydreams tremble to white
craving some fleeting outline or living complexities
I would like to be carved as stone to put an end to this floating
but I'll wait here until you let me live as human
Elle Jun 2019
Sorrow stings my borrowed eyes, for now they are dark blue
Rage and lust woven into my borrowed world
A world that has love too
Forgetting my impermanence, I beg for more borrowed time
I wonder, I search and I feel through this world
This world I long to call mine
Elle Oct 2019
The paralysis of your force inscribed invisible bruises
Their hues of purple and blue
Your spirit of **** greed lingers, consumes these moody October nights until there’s nothing left but bloodless trees and even those turn their bark inside out to avoid your everywhere else eyes
But still you howl and growl,
snarl and slither
All to convince yourself of your power
that is as useless as these corpses you’ve carved
Elle Oct 2019
So late have you fallen under a banished moon
Everlasting we fought the spheres of our own humanity
A thing unachieved so soon
We ran rampant over the Earth's blue daze
and scribbled over the democracy of time
An imposing and commanding craze
that drowns the howling wolves
Elle Jun 2019
The curse you've set upon me
Summoned through a blade
Words you have stitched into stone with ****** fingernails
The conditions of my soul
This is what you have bestowed upon me
Not hymns or hydrangeas
Not a cradle or a kiss
But words that bury me beneath a opaque myth
From me you will receive no benediction
No utterance of a prayer
No- All you will receive from me is varying hues of hell
Elle Dec 2019
Where I dwell now
Beneath the busy streets
Inside jealous palms
Atop of an echo
I'm still in the solitude of spring
and like a spider curling in on itself,
I depart
Elle Oct 2022
Don't cry, strange beauty -
The river and the wind listens
And cries gently with you
Elle Oct 2019
We found a home in the fortitude of the winter
In the voyage of a nightingale
Benevolence in abomination
and percipience borne of pandemonium
How, then, do we absolve the transgressor?
Remove the stain from white cloth?

We do not
Elle May 2019
Over there, past the valleys of knowledge
Far from the seamstresses gaze
Where night and day are letters
Written on a page
The host drew in a sharp breath
That dispelled the arching trees
Nothing shook the dream of death
Not even the sight of the seas
Elle Feb 2022
From this fragmented stretch of time
from my strange heart away from this monotonous dream
I can feel myself exist
not in any tangible or beating form
but in the occasional breath that sails in from distant, trembling summer winds
in the moonlit and barefoot dance
a symphony of sun flickering on the forest floor
my lovers eyes
all of these places which are separate and fleeting
are the only places I ever am
Elle Sep 2021
These torments of life and death meet at those great and mawing jaws of beasts and angels
You, the embodiment of innocence, were swallowed hole
Sinking inch by inch into the cruel sacrifices of God and consumption.

I saw you with your eyes wide open as you finally reached the edge of the precipice of that pink and hungry throat
Being crushed at your soft places to fit into that great and lifeless void that forced itself upon you, drawing you inside

I saw you as your face was last seen to the world
Panicked, squawking
And then submissive to that insurmountable grip, that great disappearing

You were swallowed hole
And there he sat upon a sunny rock, digesting and wholly alive
Elle Jun 2019
To be alone with him is to be alone with myself
He floats like a wisp of fog in the corners of my eyes
Asking where to go next
An impenetrable fog that manifests and multiples
I'm slightly unnerved when I see what else he veils
The dock past the brook
The edges of the corn field
The ends of my fingers
And all that I know
His season of fog after springtime
Breathes still
As I stare, transfixed
He trickles from the places he has possessed
Slithers up my spine, over my shoulder blade
And I inhale
Elle Jul 2019
I wanted you to tell me about the books you've read
To recite the sentences that made life seem kind
But your words got caught on the sharp mountaintops
And blended in with the snow between your lips

Your name stood thin
Sprawled out in front of me with a bruiseless form
I wanted to reach out and tear at the milky flesh
To find something beneath that resembled home

Once you were as I have said
A lamb that followed the light
You only dreamt of days within your sight
When I see you now, you are battered

Your sagging flesh, sick and dying
A stranger to the world
A world that insists on pushing you out
As it pushed you in

When I think of you
A flash of satin and violet
A lamb underneath the claws of life
And a woman who lost her story
Elle Oct 2022
I had only hoped to love you
to get lost in the center of the storm of you
to live on as an atom of your heart
Elle Dec 2022
In spite of everything,
I arranged flowers over my skin in a great effort to be worshiped
made myself into a garden for your plucking

I didn’t know how much of me was woman
and how much was girl

But you knew what I was
and what I would become under your caress
In spite of everything,
I offered up the entirety of my being to you
gave your selfish hands each blooming flower that you desired
For I was half asleep with longing for you
A cooing dove to your touch
and only yours
Elle Jun 2022
In a place made up of my own dreams,
the rocks timidly cover themselves with moss and vine.
Even in this place, made up of the purest honey and lullabies,
absence was conquered
not with a sword or a battle cry
but with a gentle sigh that brushed up against castle stone, the soft melancholic pull that inverted my chest

Why are you harbored so far off from the shore?
My dearest isle of dreams
Elle May 2019
It stays dark
Even in the light, it stays dark
It encapsulates you and me
And you and me
Until light tumbles upon us again
It gets so bright that the world turns to milk
And we are forced to bow to the sun
But it stays dark still
Elle Sep 2021
What you've done to me is like autumn to the leaves
You've lulled me down onto the ground
And cast me into slumber
There I'll lie
All dull and dry
What once was green is umber
Elle Dec 2019
Our hands, like branches, reach toward the sun
Fingers stretched, curved and twisted to avoid shadow
And, like branches, our relentless journey to warmth
Makes us intricate and familiar
Elle Aug 2019
As you danced beneath my eyelids
There was kicking within my womb
A silent call that begged to be assumed
You pulled and pushed from here to there

Neither inside of my heart
I bathed and cleansed my soul
Although it tore part from part
Craved within and without
I would enter sleep if I could

A dark and wondrous mourning
That stood silent as the grave
All that was left of you
Pieces of echoed art
Elle Oct 2021
When the lavender and bluebells sleep
You bloom to the moon
When the stretching morning doves drape their songs over sunbeams
Your dozing and banished petals are lost
What sacrifices would you make for the night
For the wolves
For those great and dying stars?
Moonflower,
How many more would you make?
How much more would you miss?
Elle Oct 2019
Resting in the curve of your cupid’s bow
A lullaby in limbo
The high, like ******, slays
A yellow melancholy daze
Stars that look of bubbles in champagne
Rising, bursting and dying all at once
An idyllic, delirium game
The faraway voice of Kurt Cobain
Your doleful and sulfurous song
Travels on blistered feet
on the backs of motorcycles and mist
through this flickering and tired street
Elle Jun 2019
We slept on the spare couch
A half remembered dream that I have bled for
My eyes drenched in slumberous salt
Dewy eyelids threaten to close
And yet we chase sleep into the desert
With bells dragging behind our backs
To have rest rob our pockets
A tsunami in the grave
A half remembered dream of rooftop travels and serenades
Hushed giggles in the dark
This dream that I have suffered and died for
A dream I have given my life for
Starts to fade anyway
Elle Sep 2019
A black and blue ***** solitude
that falls off the side of the couch
Stasis evoked by strident abandon
Nightshade drips from your mouth
As you begin to slide and slither down the drain
you imagine a sailboat at night
An insouciance glide atop water
your dilapidated plight
Elle Oct 2019
You began to coil around me by first placing that scarlet flower into my mouth
A renegade chevalier
Unshaken by the trembling of my hands
Eyes closed through the night
You were
even where you were not
Elle May 2019
I stepped out onto the grass
A rustling of leaves
A drip, drip, drip that slowed to a silence
He watched me
Watched beneath a weeping willow as the branches danced with the howling of the wind
My hands, small
I was just a girl, only knew the dangers of lions, tigers and bears
Who else could I have been?
Elle Oct 2022
I was surrounded by strangers as I looked out of the cruel airplane window - your horizon fell back with agonizing ease
and my soul became an eroding cliff
Bits of dying rock tumbled back down onto your shores
by no will of their own but by the natural grace of gravity

As i recall this now, feet chained to the under side of the universe,
part of me celebrates that half of my soul is missing from my chest
because it means that part of me still lives and breathes somewhere within you
Elle Oct 2019
The river wrapped around your ankles
As I willed you to stay
Tilting over the drowsy mountaintops
For just one more winsome glance
You stumbled over canyons, fell over forests
And the river let you be
Elle Jul 2019
Phases of the clouds
Gently and heavily they pass
With the day in mind
And a breeze at hand
That shatters my heart of glass
Elle Jul 2019
I remember you through photographs
Glossy and flammable
One where you’re smelling aster in a field
A dagger through my chest
One where we languidly rest by the waters edge
A reign of desolation
Another your eyes stare from behind the photograph
I want to cradle you through this photograph
Summon you through this photograph
But how can I reach you through paper and ash
Elle Oct 2021
Autumn almost feels like it belongs to places like these
Places that lounge in the waning maple sun
Places that graze on slow, foggy hymns of October
It's like they are quiet testaments to the dream that is Autumn
Elle Oct 2021
There's an abundance of wild, suspended poems hanging above our heads but there's hardly enough words to describe them down to earth.
Elle Oct 2021
Far off are you, praying for your abandoned youth
A dream dripping of honey and rosy cheeked naivety
Tendrils of chestnut and bouncing curls would cradle a face of polished glass

You would spin in those bell like circles, giggling
Giggles which were hymns
And then you turned and turned into that place which cracked that glass face
Elle Oct 2022
I did not have a heart to love you
until you sculpted it out of stone
and somehow you still could not understand
that it was made for you alone
Elle Dec 2021
Sea foam and moss covered rocks
sing thick songs of sad rage in solitude
I'm tangled and tossed in their sound
Elle Sep 2021
Draped over your braided thoughts
there lies lace and little beauties
It is almost a sort of glaring cruelty
that you clasp it, white knuckled and selfish
wholly absent from this hollow place

Underneath rests sweet innocence, a harbinger of angels,
souls and quiet romanticism
Eyes closed to that flickering flame which gasps, dying so steadily at your suspended little toes
You are still, frozen
other than those fluttering eyelashes and hungry eyes that look up at those beautiful and wicked angels which lilt only for you
Elle Oct 2022
until then, we shared a shy love
the kind of love that did not yet have a voice to speak
we lingered in those silent gardens
dandelions, snow drops and jasmine
we lingered longer in those gentle traces of fingertips over soft skin
those quiet, dimpled glances in the stairway
and i wish we lingered longer still

until we spoke, our love was shy
and then we were frightened of the voice
i had only hoped to love you
unabashedly & gently love you
but the sound rang and rang in our ears
and now our love is a different animal entirely -
it gnaws away at the soft flesh that it used to trace

until then, we shared a shy love
but now, we don't love for the quiet
we love for the hunger that must be fed
Elle Oct 2019
It rested at your feet
Covered in sand and salt
Your golden hair strummed your shoulder blades
Created a song for the breeze that passed with it
Eyes deftly searched the shoreline
Measured it a thousand times
and over again
With a sigh and disillusioned swirl
You lamented through the jaded night
Leaving your buried treasure
resting in the wake of the verdict
Elle Nov 2020
Bound to a shadow
No knowledge of the flesh that casts
All of these thoughts must reveal me somewhere within your mind
Somewhere like a cave
Deep and knowable only to those dark creatures
Like you and I

Or maybe it doesn't exist at all
Along with my idea and these thoughts which evoke no consequence
Maybe I'm somewhere like a desert
Elle Mar 2020
Spring grows louder here

Here where moss licks my toes and where the Earth breathes below
Torn through frost and fallen leaves
A golden and divine light that grows and grows and grows
Spring, take my soul, possess my eyes and bury me in soil
Do all of these things to make me a part of spring
Elle Jun 2019
It is there - in a poem I have yet to write
Hiding under the bed
It shares my spheres of sorrow
Fragrant and unsaid
It is there - my story to utter
Underneath the brush
Spoken from my unconscious mind
Constrained, pithy and lush
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