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if the world were to end
            today,
                          or tomorrow
                                                                ­                                       or someday
i’ve realized  that I don’t really care!
it doesn’t matter to me-
none of this
                                                 there is just one thing though
through all the raging and destruction
volcanoes, tsunamis and quakes
(can you hear the roars now?)
i want to remain
in your embrace
as everything crumbles around us
(can you feel that? All the crumbling. Strangely it makes me think of cookies breaking )
i just want to be held by you
the way you hold me as I fall asleep every night
(sweetly, gently)
that would be a more beautiful passage
calmer, more accepting
just like floating into a dream
(I can hardly hear the screams)
and then it would all be done
life isn’t important
nor death
the only thing that matters-
is you.
- Vijayalakshmi Harish
         02.09.2012

Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish
its annoying
that you left without saying goodbye
without as much as a wave in my direction
it feels like an incomplete conversation
as if I’m talking to myself
without a reply!

i open the door
every five minutes
keep expecting to see you on the doorstep
it just doesn’t feel
like you’re missing
you’ve always left things lacking

checking my mail has become an obsession
i'm waiting for a reply
sitting next to my phone
hoping it will sing
can’t concentrate much on anything else
got to figure out why you left

it doesn’t feel like a broken heart
how could it be
when I’m in denial
but there is this
almost physical sting
that holds me captive night and day
-Vijayalakshmi Harish
03.09.2012

Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish
I read this quote today that I really liked - "The most painful goodbyes are the ones that are never said and never explained". Tried turning it into a poem.
The doctor, a  specialist, with formidable reputation
nationally, had a secret: a rotten apple for heart;
this apple poisoned him for ever,
but, neither he noticed,
nor there was even a whisper about this!

He could have undergone a CT scan properly!

A nurse, just a junior member in his team,
by virtue of her innate qualities, a healer nonpareil,
took the pain away, from each patient,
with her kind touch, and  soothing words.
She healed very well, their  hearts, already taken over by fear,
and yet again wounded by the brash doctor's words.
Patients counted her as a savior, much more than a doctor,
the doctor was paid well and kept happy to avoid troubles!

*not medicine, state of the art machines,
or expertise unmatched; the mind to heal counts,
the gentleness of being, of doctor or whoever,
works wonders, you'd see this all around.
Immensely liked the book "Checklist manifesto" by  "New Yorker" writer and physician Atul Gawande
My life
has been all about
thoughts fighting
with thoughts
about thinking,
about to think
or not to think,
and it was an interesting
war
but stupid
and I learned a lot
about nothing
and it was extremely painful.
This war
was started
by who knows who
for no reason.
I have decided,
along with the Dalai Lama,
that what is needed
is a dialogue,
so mind has been talking
to mind
about what the reality
of this is.
We have decided
that the reality
of this is
a headache,
which could,
in time,
get better.
Beyond rippling paddy, runs a river,
Across the river, is a verdant hill,
Atop its pinnacle is a palm grove,
Above the tallest coconut  palm, sits  a civet cat,
drinking toddy, inebriated dreaming a strange light.
After having stomach full of toddy, the civet cat grows bold,
makes himself  a ball and simply fall down, avoiding the impossible task of  climbing down stone drunk.
This gentle forest, you lead me to, taking my hand, brings deja vu,
beauty in waves after waves invades, consciousness dances in pleasure,
profusion of colors, bird tweets, whisper of leaves,medley of fragrances,
mind swims in magic waters, when your lips touch mine, I faint.
Remember the old Russian song."Let's go to the forest said Alyosha,/ Let's... let's, but only together"
A dropped ball on the goal line
A tackle missed down field
It's amazing how a football game
Can make a man's mind yield

We come to tears when our teams lose
Even worse when our team wins
It's when we show all our emotions
It's when we break the MANLY SINS

But our girlfriend gets real angry
When we don't utter a word
When they want to talk of feelings
It's a word we've never heard
We're MEN and **** proud of it
We show support for MANLY things
Like football games and racing cars
Not relationshippy things

We wear our hearts upon our sleeve
When the two minute gun has sounded
When the game has come to overtime
When the last corner has rounded

We sit upon our seats edge
Nothing can break us from this trance
Not even when our **** girl
Comes and does a naked dance

But our girlfriend gets real angry
When we don't utter a word
When they want to talk of feelings
It's a word we've never heard
We're MEN and **** proud of it
We show support for MANLY things
Like football games and racing cars
Not relationshippy things

We cry when our dog passes
We get upset when things go wrong
But we'll never show emotion
To a ****** Adele song

We aren't built to be emotive
At least not when women want us to
I'll tell you more about emotion
When the football season's through
Riding bikes
Skinning Knees
Time spent climbing
All the trees
Sit back and feel
the summer breeze
Remember how it was?

Swimming pools
Baseball games
Every kid had
funny names
The times they just
don't seem the same
Remember how it was?

Summer time was glorious
You only had a kids concerns
No school until September
You didn't care if you got burned
Summer time was heavenly
A pirates life , you led
You were out 'till past the sun went down
Then it was dinner, bath and bed

Marbles, swimming
At the creek
A hundred kids
playing hide and seek
Cadging smokes
Of which none would speak
Remember how it was?

Building forts
And running wild
Outside all day
where sunshine smiled
Living the life
Of every child
Remember how it was?

Summer time was glorious
You only had a kids concerns
No school until September
You didn't care if you got burned
Summer time was heavenly
A pirates life, you led
You were out 'till past the sun went down
Then it was dinner, bath and bed

Baseball, soccer
cards in spokes
Blood brothers
and ***** jokes
trading cards
and drinking cokes
Remember how it was

Running fast
and walking slow
A few weeks left
To school we'll go
Tag...you're it
Friend or foe
Remember how it was?

Summer time was glorious
You only had a kids concerns
No school until September
You didn't care if you got burned
Summer time was heavenly
A pirates life, you led
You were out 'till past the sun went down
Then it was dinner, bath and bed
Imagine going to a cliff
And jumping off to die
Hoping that you somehow grow wings
And that in a blink can fly

Now, shut your eyes
Do it again
This time, you make the leap
Is the cliffside still as steep a one?
Is the water just as deep?

You're a writer and you do this jump each day
When you post your words and rhymes
You put yourself where all can see
And can comment on your crimes
You took the leap, you're airborne
And sometimes you will soar
At other times you'll crash down to earth
Where you started long before

Now, go back to the cliffs edge
Write some words and sail away
You're out there high in the ether
And if you're good that's where you'll stay

Commitment to your writing
Accepting what the others write
Make you go and keep on leaping
Until you know you've got it right

You're a writer and you do this jump each day
When you post your words and rhymes
You put yourself where all can see
And can comment on your crimes
You took the leap, you're airborne
And sometimes you will soar
At other times you'll crash down to earth
Where you started long before

Go now, jump...make it a good one
One where you feel the wind as well
where you can see into the future
And where only you can tell

Each poem you post is gone now
You make the leap each time you post
A poem is something living
Unwritten ones are only ghosts

You're a writer and you do this jump each day
When you post your words and rhymes
You put yourself where all can see
And can comment on your crimes
You took the leap, you're airborne
And sometimes you will soar
Now, go, create and you will see
That you can with less fear than before.
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