I have nothing left
So I'll immerse myself in my own thoughts
Emotions
And the music of a thousand symphonies
Just to drown out my ****** up reality.

When you look at him
You see a violent man ready to attack.

When I look at him
I see the guy who carried me around Disney World on his shoulders.

When you look at him
You see a possible drug distributor in the state of Florida.

When I look at him
I see the guy who LARPs in his front yard with his friends.

When you look at him
You see a ****.

When I look at him
I see the guy who held my hand before I got on my first rollercoaster to comfort me.

When you look at him
You see the man you shot because he, "charged."

When I look at him
I see an innocent man killed in cold blood.

When you look at him
You see suspect white male early 20s wearing basketball shorts and a tshirt.

When I look at him
I see Derek Cruice.

I've been a construction worker
My entire adult
Life.

Still, I cannot
Seem to rebuild
Her confidence.

I've been a poet for
As long as I can
Remember,

But my encouraging
Hollow-point-words shatter
Against her insecure kevlar.

Suppose all I can be is
Sunlight, water and
Soil.

I'll try that; I've been a
Farmer's boy since
Birth.

If you want to play,
Lets play Scrabble,
We can mix up our letters,
And make fun with our words.
Let's play Monopoly,
We can pretend we have fancy cars
And spend money like we own it.
Oh, I got it...
Lets play Life!
We can pick our own jobs
And buy temporary houses.
If you want to play,
Let's do this.
Please, just don't play with my heart.