Hopeless
   the days drag on
      getting *slower and slower

No drive
No reason
    to get out of bed

Did they human race
    really evolve out of mud?

If so,
   What was the purpose?
   Why?
   It doesn't make sense
      *Why do we live if there
           is nothing to live for?

we do not touch, but i still know
we're phoenixes
next time, we'll get it right
next time, i'll write your name and scream your name and love you until the farthest star's light finally makes it to earth and dies out quietly
like the milky way is in your ribs
and your breath, your carcinogens
is existence, is the only galaxy i'll ever begin to fathom
only beginning, for there are not enough light years to
uncover the breadth and depth of your immutable soul
we will be beacons
everlasting flecks of consequence
reflecting in pools of young lovers
when the earth as we know it
is no longer in service

You fly me up
to the sky
before you turn me down
on the very next day
Living with you
is a constant battle
between smiling, and crying
Maybe we never complete
each other like a puzzle
in the first place
Maybe we're much more like
two lost hurricanes,
destined to meet
Same chaos; same structure
Destroying -- and building --
each other at the same time

well, at least I know that
you love me just the same
as I do.

I so don't care
care not if you wipe you fat *** with my poetry
I don't do it for you
I do it all for me

My name would mean nothing
if I concerned myself with trivialities
like it would touch one liken to me
for I have no soul

I died so many years ago
I just don't know I'm already dead
so do with it what you will
go on take your fill

By Christos Andreas Kourtis aka NeonSolaris

i cry too much
and i find myself in a lot of trouble
i am not pretty
or at least i don't find myself pretty
i don't feel comfortable in dresses
i don't like the way i smile
and i most importantly
don't like my history
i don't like the way
everyone let me down
i don't like the way
i let myself go down
i don't like it that i let myself
sink into desperation
i don't like being alone
but i didn't have any friends
i don't like the way i have been treated
and i don't like that i'm too nice
i hate that i could forgive
but never get forgiveness
i hate that i was a friend
and that i was used
i hate that my life turned to be this way
i hate that i was a creep
i hate i was the one with a condition
i know
now
that i hate
how
i never loved myself enough
to let anyone love me

Do you ever have dreams?
They’re curious little creatures aren't they?
My dreams, well they like to tease me.

They show me false images of me with wonderful people.
They get me aroused.
They give me delicious treats, with horrible after tastes.

Mommy, why do they do this to me?
I wake up crying so often.
I try and try to stop them.

But sometimes they get mad and give me nightmares.
So I just let them go ahead with their dreams.

I wake up at 3, wipe my tears, and hide under my blankets.
I ask my dreams why they do this to me?
Did I do something wrong?

But they just snicker, and I put up with it.

Daddy is that why people jump off of bridges?
Did their dreams be mean to them too?

But I am left with all of this to think about.
I have no daddy to talk to, and my mommy has changed,
she’s not bad, she just doesn't give me the right answers.

God will you listen?

I love you. All of you. Including your flaws. Maybe especially them. It is to the point where I wonder if I'd love you at all if you were perfect. I love you for everything that you aren't, for every hiccup in your genetic makeup, every nick on your face, everything that they make gels and scrubs to get rid of. For every time you fell short of the mark, every time you almost did but didn't. I love you for all the things you could never love about yourself, all the skeletons in your closet, all the things you'd rather no one ever know enough about to love. And you are completely ignorant to that fact, and perhaps that is another flaw that has me falling more and more in love with you.

the streets are wet & shining with the lights of the cars.

it was quiet.
;thoughts were too loud.

The only noise that is barely audible is the light sound of drizzle.

The air has a bit of chill in it.
its dark.
but everything is still visible.

in the distance, you can only make out silhouettes;
shadows of people prowling through the streets.

you look up at the sky, viewing all the stars.
Watching the grey clouds glide over the moons light.