The Buzz
Makes me warm
Daring
I can take on the world
I no longer care about
What others think

It's just me

My fun

Not my sighs

But it always leaves

And the emptiness returns with a vengeance

And I doubt that things will ever change
But hope always floods my mind
It charges and builds up
Trapped in my own head yet free
And it makes my soul vibrate

And I get The Buzz

What were my goals born of?
Desire for more,
The feeling I would die if I didn't follow them
The knowledge that I can acheive them
The idea that this is what I was born to do?

Or am I just to scared to persue
What I wabt to do?
Will I ever be brave enough to figure it out?

Nightmares don't scare me.
Confrontation slays all the thoughts,
That plague me,
That make me anxious,
That shrink to nothing.
So I wage a war everyday
On my insecurities and the reality
That all hate is based in some miniscule truth.
On my side are rationalizations
And obvious evidence against my stupid fears.
But some day
I won't be able fight them off
And my own thoughts will end me


Now that's scary.

Borne under the good sign,
Or the bad,
If the enigma caught on,
to the trailing self,
it would be a question,
would the superlative,
be monstrous?
Or the make shift believer;
Would it all make sense?
Scribbles...
Either I have signed my life
or destroyed it,
In the pursuit.
It is the mental mind,
That produced this end,
The markings the etching,
That causes a chasm,
It will obliterate the skies!
Magnitude.
The sense of belittlement,
had been extinguished,
The tribes borne of the future,
would marvel at etchings,
Engraved in sand,
The beauty all extinguished,
Among the belittled beauty, at,
simple existence,
of complex life,
The hereditary displacement,
coherent to our establishment,

There is a latency
in progression,
The mixture's
Teeth,
Bind,
Conform
In singularity,
The future forgets itself,
the zen logic is missing,
between pustules,
between synapses,
between the heavy,
and the lucid.