I’m trapped and there’s no getting out.
I try to go up but I stumble and fall even farther.
I try and reach out for something, someone, to grab, to hold on to
But, there is nothing, no one.
                I’m Alone
Is this how it ends?
Do I fall until I can’t possibly fall anymore?
Does it end with me falling, past the point of return
Past the point of ever coming back?
                I’m Alone
I open eyes that I didn’t know were closed.
Everything around me is crumbling,
Falling apart.
I’m going to be crushed but, no one can help me
                I’m Alone
It gets harder to breathe
My chest feels tight
I’m drowning, even though I’m on dry land
There’s not a soul in sight to pull me out of the water
                I’m Alone
Everything is getting darker
I don’t feel like I used too
As my eyes close, my vision fills with hazel eyes and dark hair
You said you would be there, but you weren’t
               I’m Alone

I tried; tried so hard to be perfect.
I wanted to be everything you wanted but I hated everything that I became.
I tried to justify what I was doing.
I thought maybe I would grow to like the new me better than the old me.

This new me was everything I wasn't.
She was: confident, flirty, ****.
She was so comfortable and open that she didn't care if people saw what was underneath everything,
But I do.

I hated this new me.
I hated the old me.
Everyone I knew saw this confident young woman but underneath, hiding, was the real me.
A scared, self conscious, little girl.

I eventually gave up trying.
I couldn't handle pretending to be someone I wasn't.
It was too hard.
That's a lie; being someone else was easy. Too easy.
It was so easy I felt wrong doing it.

You eventually gave up interest.
You said I had changed
I wasn't the girl you knew
I wasn't the girl you loved
You didn't know who I was anymore
It made sense, I didn't know who I was anymore

It hurt, hearing you say those words
I spent so long trying to be someone you could love
and then you ended up falling in love with someone who wasn't me.

Its crazy you know,
How one second you're strangers
Then the next second,
You're falling in love.

You fall hard
And fast
Never sure where you're going to land
But knowing that you will.

Ive always wondered,
"Why?"
Why is it 'falling' in love?
Now I know.

Its because you fall
You let down your gaurd
Just for a second
And you fall.

You fall with the hope
That someone will catch you
Someone will be at the bottom
You fall

Then
When you hit bottom
It hurts
As if you really hit

It hurts,
To be away
from them,
just for a second

It hurts,
Waking up
From a dream about being together,
And seeing you're alone

It hurts,
Knowing
That they're hurting
But you cant help

It hurts,
To know,
They'll never know
How important they are

It hurts,
To know,
They'll never know
How much you love them

It hurts,
To know,
They'll never know
You cant live without them

That's what love is
It's hurting,
For them,
But it's not pain.

Its just hurting.

To whoever finds this...
Tell him,
I love him.
(He probably hates me)
Tell him,
I'm sorry.
(But, he'll never forgive me)
Tell him,
I didn't want to hurt him.
(But I  know I did)
Tell him,
This wasn't his fault.
(Although he thinks it is)
Tell him,
It's okay.
(Even if he's not
Tell him,
I know he's hurting.
(Because I did too)
Tell him,
He can move on
(But I hope he won't.)
Tell him,
Dont forget me
(Although I know he will)
Tell him,
(Please, don't)

To my Love,
My life is over now.
You can find me where the darkness meets the day
Where the past lays to rest
Where the future takes its first breath
Where secrets are forever kept
That's where I shall be

There is no time where the sand runs deep
There is no death
There is no life
There is no hate
There is no light
The world knows no love like that of a dying sun

A world without me is a world that will go on spinning
It is a day that will never end
It is a flower that will never wilt
It is a child that will never forget how to trust
It is a river that never meets a dam
Life will not stop now that I am gone

Do not cry love,
It may seem there is no color but you must look harder
When the chocolate has turned bitter
When the sun has turned to night
When trees have lost their leaves
You must look harder, my love

Dear you are not alone
I will always be with you dear, helping you to see
I will help you find strength in bitterness
I will help you find peace in the night
I will help you find hope in the change of the seasons
You are never alone

My life is over now
But yours has only just begun

What if I could just get away?
I could just leave and never look back
I'd take the first train, bus, flight, taxi, boat, anyway
It'd be so easy to just up and leave
Everything's already packed
I wouldn't leave anything behind
I don't have any ties, I never got close, and this is why
I knew that someday I would leave
It would be so easy
In the middle of the night
Everyone is asleep, no one to notice I left
They wouldn't find out untill the next morning
They wouldn't know that I found a way out, just like I always said I would
Someday I'll do it
But not today
Today I don't have the courage
Someday
One day
I'll have the courage and I'll do it
I'm gonna do it
I'm gonna leave and I won't look back
I'll leave, get away
I'll leave and be free