Listen to what I mean, not what I say. Because its 1am and I'm eleven poems in. I just texted "Yeah I'm fine lol" and I'm sitting in the bathtub, my chin wearing the mascara my eyes sported earlier and I'm too tired to chase my sanity down the drain.

When my eyes first met yours, they were filled with love
You made my heart beat heavily into my skin above
Your smile so deep and so crisp
Would whisper into our kiss
Now when my eyes meet yours, they are filled with tears
As I shatter all the bedroom mirrors
That once held the many lies
As you turned and said goodbye

You stand in front of the mirror...
Can you imagine what it would be like to be that one girl/boy that everyone liked? That everyone thought was so amazing and you longed to be just like them in anyway shape or form possible?
You realize you're nothing like them. That you are just that hopeless romantic, the day-dreamer, crazed perfectionist, who stands in the shadows of a fake personality. Covered by lies trying to gain just the slightest bit of self worth to make yourself feel like you matter.
You stand in front of the mirror...
Are you even a real person, or someone who just strives to be like one.

your heart was always out of reach
and mine was always in your hands
but if you listen closely
you can hear my ribs cracking
to the rhythm of your breathing
your grip tightens 
my heart screams 
you laugh
i beg
you lie
we fight
"do you think I'll cry?" I ask
"you know I'll try" you counter
the sky darkens as you smile
nothing unusual 
i think about when I paced my halls
at three in the morning on a sunday
and how it was just like when 
you pulled me underwater 
and it felt like I was breathing fire 
and suddenly you're talking about
when we first met
in that church parking lot
when it started something
that was anything but holy
and I laugh at the irony
it was better than any poetry
i could ever write 

[holyoak]

And when it comes to an end
your tears will be for nothing
your scars will mean nothing
because this is
you are
you all are
nothing
as we all are aware of this fact
we strangle ourselves into the illusion of **** actually meaning something
we are aware
we hide behind these lies as if they aren't transparent
we are here
on and in
this nothingness
out to make it something
that will inevitably be nothing