Empty...
That is how i feel since you walk into my life and taken what seemed to be my youth
I feel like i have an empty void inside of me..
A void that can never be filled
A void that is so dark, it scares me even now as i think about it.

Alone...
Feeling as if I’m about to be stricken by madness too since you’ve been gone
For is it a crime for one to crave for company
For one to just have someone to hold at night and call their own
For the heart to long for another that beats exactly as it does

Disgust...
As i imagine you grinding on him as if it were me
How can you kiss my lips and pretend like you never kissed his?
How can you hold him close like you held me?
How can you be so heartless...and let me feel like I’m going to die on the inside?

Lost...and yet found...
Now i understand why a great poet said,
“we are all imperfect but its how we deal with our imperfections that makes us perfect”
You were part of my imperfections
And the best way of dealing with this imperfection is walking away
Walking away from all the pain and heartache
From the dark void and into the light
Your indiscretions were my epiphany...my clarity
...my way of solitude...

If there's one thing out there
That's not as simple as it is
I can say it's me
And so much more
Because I can't see one perfection
In all those imperfections

So I'm technically certifiable,
And you're the type that I want to keep around.
I'm the kind of person
That holds onto letters and movie ticket stubs
And drawings with hearts on them.

I'm not great at letting go,
But I'm sure as you've noticed,
I'm fantastic
At getting attached.

And I'm the kind of girl
Who doesn't stick around very long,
Because losing people is unbearable,
But I'm also the kind of girl
That sticks to her word
No matter what.

And what if I made a promise,
To both you and myself,
That I'm going to be around
For as long as oxygen sifts through the breeze?
And what if I told you
That's the only promise I need?

I'm shivering
And wrapped up in your sweatshirt,
And you probably fell asleep
(Not like I blame you, you were tired)
But I can't seem to tell if I'm shivering out of being cold
(As per usual)
Or shivering because I'm so excited
To love you.

You promised me
You're not going anywhere,
And maybe I'm a little sentimental,
But listening to music that makes me think of you,
Helps me come to terms
With how much I trust in you and that promise.
Everything is telling me that this is right,
And safe,
And I don't normally place bets
Because I generally lose,
But I'll write it out now,
Because I bet we'll make it.

Give me something/anything to hold on to this moment/you.

Will you love me, my dear?
Throughout the night
Then I will hear
Your screams in midnight

I will make love, my dear
Shadows in moonlight
Then I will hear
Your screams in midnight

I will be yours, my dear
As you hold me tight
Then I will hear
Your screams in midnight



Copyright 2016

It's 4.47am,
We promised each other we'd try to sleep at 3.08am,
But I'm consumed by thoughts of you,
And this happiness and affection that'***** us out of nowhere;
Scares me.
I fear not a change of your heart,
For I've been there before,
Walked on that shaky floor,
I fear inadequacy,
You meteor of a person,
I want you to have the best,
And with no intent of self deprecation,
No tolerance for being told I'm worth it,
I know I will fall short,
I love you more than any emotion I've ever known,
But I want to feel okay about you loving me too.
Good night