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 Sep 2016
Graff1980
My past is a plague of pain
shadows that bruise
memories that leave
red marks,
but the isolation
was probably the worse.

I mastered pain
at a young age.
I could take a beating
better than anyone
I knew.

The trick was to let her
hurt me just enough;
resist just enough
then give her
A teary show.
Submitting
to her rage
because resistance
just fueled her
violent tendencies.

But when the beatings stopped
when she got caught
I became a prisoner
locked away
shriveled
A withering shade.

A child
looking at a world
that did not miss me
longing
for the freedom
that waited
just on the other side
of death.

Crying,
cringing,
flinching,
wishing,
At ten years old
that I was dead.
I am not.
Somehow,
I smile.
I go on
taking my pain
and turning it
inwards to introspection
and outwards to compassion.
I think there for I plan
to be a better man
and in moments of clarity
I know that I am.

But sometimes
when I go back
slipping on wet stones
slick with my old
suicide pain
when I let the memories
the regrets, and fears
take me again
there is that blade of pain
waiting
whispering
“**** yourself you worthless
*******”
When powers she wields
river she breaks homes
floods paddy fields

Swords of rains
swells her hurt pride
boils her veins

Vengeful she brims
breaks the lock gate
cultivator's dreams

Gone is sweet flow
in the moonlight
soft silver glow

Simmers her soul
raging red hot
she burns like coal

With inflamed tides
she devours the crop
growing on her sides

River now a curse
she wouldn't recede
without leaving scars

She can't be blamed at all
men have only ravaged her
taken her all.
 Sep 2016
Aztec Warrior
Life: A Carnival

In so many ways
we are a human freak show,
just a breathing carnival attraction.
So get the ******* your high horse,
look around
be mesmerized,
hypnotized
and wonderized by a world of awe.
Let’s get real,
move a few strands of DNA
from here to there,
drop some chromosomes at the deli
to re-arrange their eating patterns
and we would see that
those mindless amoebas down the street
is talking our language.
Of all the billions of species
populating this planet,
we humans are the most
ignorant, opinionated,
**** for brains fools.
We puff out our stupidity
on a regular basis,
books, movies, music,
TV and social media
24/7/365
there is no end to the
racist, slime eating,
motherfukers
brought out in grand displays
as “experts”
in a single hour
of opinion disguised as “news”
on Fox, or CNN,
NBC, ABC or CBS
a menagerie of fools.

The world is a marvelous place,
alive with diversity,
which we should embrace.
All of us, humans wide,
emerged from Africa,
humanities origins
10's of thousands of years ago.

We humans are a carnival,
a side tent freak show,
all diverse and magnificent.
And to all those idiot
religious fanatics,
USA, USA ignoramuses,
de-evolve your brains,
slither back under your rock,
go back to your ancient,
long gone
humanoid origins,
become like you are,
extinct.

Aztec Warrior/redzone 8.28.16
Note: yes it’s a rant after watching an hour of Fox
CNN and MSNBC news... I must go throw up now.
Apologies to Natalie Merchant whose song “Carnival”
is embedded below, her song is a much more kinder
celebration of our diversity.. I on the other hand
cannot stay calm in the face of fascist fanatics
pretending to speak for human beings.
....thanks for reading...
the music link is to Natalie Merchant's, "Carnival"
https://youtu.be/VQ_Wqtnlv4U
 Sep 2016
CA Guilfoyle
Sitting under these trees waiting
maybe all day for the moon
or the washing rain upon my face
lay upon this mossy grass, all sunk in
pay no mind to where I've been
no matter - awake or dreaming
I fly into the forest with birds
waxwings, Bohemians
under maple leaves
sun dappled, shining
or perched in the pinewoods
a safe place to hide away
a heart that's dying.
 Sep 2016
Torin
Does this body now become a cloud
And drift over horizons
Looking for new mornings
While raining all the world he knew?
Does the sunset hold some meaning
Teaching painful lessons
About how even beautiful days
Ends in dark and dysmal night?
Do my eyes look upwards for the sky
Do my hands dig deeper in the dirt
Do I accept that most of the questions I ask
Will never be answered?
 Sep 2016
Cynthia Jean
dry drunk son,
sallow of complexion
victim at heart
nothing
ever his fault
disdains
flushes his family
away

daughter
mother of two
enables the addict
the shooter husband
every time
the poor thing he is
every time
and he still gets to
call the shots!

and she flushes the family
away as well

throws their love in the street


and the eight year old
granddaughter
and the three year old
boy

forage
climb the refrigerator
leaving footprints
literally
live in chaos
and filth
codependent
on the addict

and the family's flushed away

their love thrown in the street

and it's all about the addicts
and it's all about the addicts
and it's all about the addicts
and it's all about the addicts
and it's all about the addicts
and it's all about the addicts

nothing is ever their fault

and the family's flushed away

their love thrown  in the street

and the children

what of them.......

what of them.......

what of them.......

cj 2016
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