I was crowded by the beggars

One of them said," Lovers are the melancholic beggars".

she'll walk off
and you'll walk behind,
you feel like a man
and see everything in soft focus exposure
and her walking ahead, timid and feeling triumphant.
this was your first kiss
and not your last kiss
but your most important kiss;
the foundation kiss,
the scaffold kiss,
cathedral columns holding up the whispering gallery of this kiss.

or did you walk off
and she walked behind,
did she feel like a woman,
soft, warm, and kind seeing everything is a hard focus exposure?
that was her second kiss,
not her last kiss
and not her most important kiss;
it was a mill stone kiss,
a grist lipped ground-down-again kiss,
a motel-hotel-roadside chapel of cheap kisses kiss.

If I get taken to court, thrown in jail over this I'll lose my brains

Maybe literally, by gunshot

As if a 17 year old girl can not think for herself,
As if her parents need to use the law to protect her,
From the cancer which is me.

Really though,

I don't care anymore,

I'm numb just like she was when she told me to get over her,

But she's hurting,

I don't want to kiss her,

But I do want to hug her,

For her, because even if I don't feel right now it doesn't mean
Doesn't mean I can't help someone else.
Help them feel again.

For her.