the first time you wake in prison, you forget
eyes slow to open, free and glad
but, seldom a blink and you remember
it was freedom that you had.
i want to go now
unmitigated pain, my friend
its quite enough to break me so,
and i think i've met my end.
asleep in a stainless coffin
among the scarves of smoke
this hurt is merely stars at night
but the night, grief-strick- he spoke.
and from my broken jaw, i scream
and beg for a lifeboat
to save me from this seething blaze
and these hands around my throat.
and to my pain, i speak of wish
to have my noose and do them in
i know he's only testing me
so i insert my head and grin.
but, alas, the rope pulls through
my stool is kicked away
and i know that finally on this earth
i shouldn't live another day.
they say that there is beauty in the struggle
for you, im sure, but for me, there's never been
in all of the world's demons, struggle
is the ugliest i've seen.