In a few moments I'd be thirty-five
Excited not but a feeling of dread
Time has come but have yet to arrive
I lay with a pillow over my head.

Tears streaming with eyes burning hot
Gasps in between, riddled with disbelief
Mess I've made that I wished I had not
It manifests itself in full ****** grief.

Discontented with how far I've fallen
Far cry from any semblance of my dream
So deep, wonder how far I'd have sunken
Long way down fraught with tears it would seem.

The sun had shone in the days before
Tonight it seems I'm alone in the dark
Wounds I thought had healed; still open, and sore
Thought they'd disappear but instead leave a mark.

Where do I turn before I start moving
I wish that I had some sort of bearing
Truth is in circles I have been walking
Plagued by questions that now need answering.

Like every year, I'd still make my journey
A lifetime it seems; walking with aimless pace
Wounds be forgotten and would scar eventually
Next year, I'd arrive back at this very same place...

In sea of contradictions you have to swim across with your convictions

I found a hundred dollar bill
In the Target parking lot
Placed an ad with some guy named Craig
To find who's bill it was they lost

I truly am amazed
At the people calling me
And how many lose their money
Like it was grown on trees

When I asked the question of
Round about what date
There was silence on the line
Guess they really couldn't say

But they all swore up and down
That it was their hundred bill
I informed them all that I'd get back
As my phone would not stay still

I had so many heartfelt calls
That it made me think
Of this one grand idea
As I headed to the bank

I really felt so bad
For all the people and their woes
That I emptied out my account
Of all of it's doe

I looked all the people who called me up
And drove out to their place
It was worth the money
To see the joy on every face

Now I'm broke as I can be
No more money have I got
Spending the days left to me
Scouring the Target parking lot