depression is back like a prison sentence i forgot i was serving.
freedom felt like a vacation instead of a destination and
summer ended months ago.
there is so much more weight than there used to be but
there is also nothing there and i don't know
how to explain how much slower i'm walking.
i lie more, cry more, sit alone inside more and
i'm left wishing i could go home but
a little voice inside me says
you are.

take me back to years ago. take me back where i wasn’t like this. take me back when i didn’t hate so much. take me back to when i wasn’t surrounded. take me back to when i didn’t only pay attention to the rhetoric of internal slumber. emotions at rest today, having no heart to hold them anymore. where is the relief?

Imagine yourself
Absent all self-awareness
But fully conscious

please, i’m begging you.
let me mend your soul back to happy.
let me heal the broken parts
let me help
let me ******* love you.