Why can't I help you get rid of your sadness?
Why do you run?
Am I that monster that scares you away?
Don't think I haven't noticed that we are two sides of this coin,
I hate that I am this devil to your perfect angel,
But can this mold be broken?
If it can, it would be too late,
Because I see you hiding,
I see your running,
Is it from me?
Or the monster inside?
Am I helping?
Or am I making your sadness worse?
I need to know,
Because if the latter is so,
Then I will leave,
I will go

you say mental illness is a big deal until
i am sitting surrounded by trash in my car because its the only place i feel safe
until
i am crying when i wake up because i don't want to wake up
until
i am searching through pictures trying to find a scrap of light
until
i am sitting on the bathroom floor drinking the half empty beer i found in the recycling
until
i get attached to the drawings on my legs and cry when they go away
until
my plants all die because i cant water them
until
my pets die because i cant feed them
until
i starve myself on accident
until
my room has to be heavy or i cant breathe
until
i block everyone on my contacts list because i feel like they are watching me
until
i cant run anymore
until
i cant walk anymore
until
there is nothing left but you still want more

You threw bitter cold
Words
At my trembling heart
My mind was too frozen
To reply

If I lay
Still in
The darkness
Of night
I can hear the
Rhythmic sound
Of the clock
I time in
My mind
The tic after the
Last tock
The soothing
Sound of
Chimes
Singing in
The wind
Even the
Churning of
My stomach
Making rounds
The yapping of
A dog far
Down.
The street
Stillness fills
The air
And an angel's
Sigh
Waiting to.
Be heard