I always think drinking solves everything but the only thing solved is realizing that everybody is always drinking with others to have fun and I'm always drinking alone to ....
Exist.
Escape.
Erase.
Arouse.
Unwind.
But it never works.
It.
N   E
  V
    E
R
Works.

Tears roll down the edge of her cheeks
Pushed to the brink
"It was me"
That she thinks

So she sits and stirs
About the he's and the hers
In a fast paced world
Where close your eyes
And it's over

A disappointment at best
Would they still miss you
The answer is yes

A gentle caress
In time she'll express
For now just be patient

i didnt mean to stick you in a room filled with strangers
no tv set
no friends
no family
just you
yourself
and nothing
so nurses could sedate you
torture you
take away what little sanity
you might hold onto
your voice was shaky
scared sounding
id never seen you scared before
but today
even i felt scared for you
you used to be my rock
you used to carry the weight of the world
on your shoulders until one day
i started seeing how the world was always carrying the weight
of you
even i felt the pressure
i grew tired
like the wrinkles on your face
and the circles under your eyes
by the way you really need to sleep
i hope your sleeping now
i just hope you remember to live
when you wake

im at a stand still,
im in a lost state,
im at a
should i move forward,
should i believe my intuition,
should i lie that its true?
should i forgive myself
for giving up on something
that i once wanted
to find out
what is new

If it hurts your chest
You either love it
Whole heartedly
Or hate it
There's no in between
That grey area is
The waves of the future
To proceed
To not
To forgive
Or to
Move on

Hungry for an escape?
Her eyes
Always make them chase

I know I should eat
But I'm too full to be hungry
I know I should sleep
But I'm too awake to be tired
I know I should grieve
But I'm too hurt to forgive
....
2beContinued

you are white walls
of an artist whom is lost
you are the colors to the ink
from a brush
that was hidden
you are the lost
we are the found
but you are too blind from darkness
to see the light of the sun.

I'm forgetting words
I stumble and Stutter and shout and lash out at the very people that love me
(Why do they love me?)
Is it because they have to
Society makes them

the sky so golden so pure
the red the gold the auburn hue
glowing so brightly
hidden eyes
of the ones so true
the rain falls on the wicked and the good
it can be me or it can be you

the weather does not discriminate
good bad mediocre it dont care your all wet
youre all set for ups or downs
for crowns or crows
for snakes and arrows

when love and intimacy means everything

you dont need a ring
to define love wins
to define

love means

life lived and learned
or life lived but never learned
which ever you perfer
what ever your quirks
life has its twerks
of unwinding
unweaving
of showing reason
even in the harshest of season

when all was told and done,
family and friends will lie within,
nothings gonna matter,
about the ****** weather,
just a speck in the flow,
a grain of sand
of let go
realizing that life is short
oak or willow
how will you be -
will you bend or will you break
the oak will break
but willow will bend
thus common knowlege
that line i said.
hold on tight to the water
though it is liquid and a bit
'a bother
hold too tight and youll have nothing
hold to lose and watch it sploosh
a speck of knowledge
wasted

your worth is never measured in
likes
smiles
hugs
kisses
***
beauty
weight
energy
intelligence
e­mpathy
sympathy
friendliness
happiness
sadness
anger
or how approachable you are or arent
worth is measured in the same way a clock should be
thrown in the trash so you can start to live life the way you were meant to
through the eyes of you
and not through other peoples!

Chocolate pudding
Cheese
Where'd did all the summer leaves go
Gone with the wind
Rustling through the trees
All that's left is broken dreams
Cries and screams
A Made up belief
Make shift keys
Crooks & thieves
Everyone leaves

Tears roll from every corner
Crashing into eachother
Someone switched on
Irrational thinking
Try to remind yourself
Yesterday is gone

You can't be happy being someone you aren't
You can't replace them
You can't be them
It can be unhappy being you
Until you're clear what
You is truly you

No dying
You are important
Even when you feel
Unimportant

music is like laughter
running is the same as drugs
the most similarity to all
is that
all takes time to build up
happy vibes
but why not move
why not try and error
because the side of caution
is missing out on
happiness
potentially?
(endorphins)
if you trust scientists?

Dear tea
As I write this
I hope you're smiling thinking
**** do I taste good

The world would be so boring
If everything worked out perfectly
And sometimes
Things seem to happen
For a reason
Outside of your belief
But if you can discover it
That once red flag
Becomes a blessing
Not all help is clear
Concrete
Or direct
Sometimes the mirror effect
Just works