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Angel Mar 2017
Mom, dad, child, sibling;
This nuclear family you have in mind
no longer exists today.

Homes are mixed, split, shared
time meaning nothing to the children but
adults taking what is theirs.

Entitlement surges through moms and dads
talking about his time, her time, their time
but never about our time.

Homes no longer feel like home
but places you go to sleep, wake, and go about your day.
Not knowing who's house you will be in,
and stepparents making you feel incompatible.

There are no more yelling matches
but now there are finance matches,
who pays what, when, or where.

Why can't you just get along
and stop with all the hate?
Angel Mar 2017
Where do I begin my journey,
is it walking down the road without turning back
or is it driving past the red lights as fast as I can?

Running away never seemed to solve my problems
like a child throwing a temper tantrum in the middle of the store isle.

No longer a teenager
waiting on mom and dad to deal with my anger;
Sitting alone in the corner wondering why the tears
keep rolling down like tidal waves across my face.

The car is on humming that beautiful engine sound
the birds are out and the sun is bright,
but I can't move my body to make that first move.

Am I waiting to make a change or am I stuck in the same routine?
I continuously ask myself as I feel the heat of the sun on my face
not knowing how to change.
Angel Feb 2017
My heart aches for what once was;
The sound of your voice, the touch of your finger tips.
Missing you is hardest when
the sunlight goes down.

I lay alone wondering where it went wrong,
why I wasn't enough.
That twinkle in my eye you once saw
is now just another tear sliding down my face.
Our love once shined brightly
but now my sadness drapes over the blinds shutting out the light.

I miss the way you made me laugh,
the way I held your hand;
we are no longer friends nor lovers.
It breaks my soul at every thought,
knowing you were my first and my last; my beginning and end.
Angel Feb 2017
Little girl formed in your womb; you couldn't admit this isn't what you wanted. You hid your pain through the needle in your vein.

As she is born she begins crying, shaking caused by the drugs forced in her system. She screams in pain while you walk away, getting high to forget your ****.

This little girl who was brought into the world, alone never knowing what love is or could be. Her life is not her own, unwanted and lonely not knowing where she fits in.

She's growing up, looking for love in all the wrong places.
Pregnant at 15 cuz her parents couldn't raise her any better.

Grandma pleads, crying don't let her go;  mama turns her head as daddy walks out the door.

Run away little girl, far from the pain, far from the noise.
Now it's time to grow up and be done with all the hate.

Your son is born, his daddy doesn't want him. Reality sets in; you're doing this on your own.

Little girl, you aren't so little; now with a child in your arms you promise not to give up.  Remind him he is wanted and that he is loved. Remind him you didn't walk away to put a needle in your vein.
Angel Feb 2017
It wasn't that you said you loved me or that you even cared
but how you showed me that you were never really there.

At first it was just a love tap;
right across my chest, deep into the the depth of my soul.
Screaming inside just please let me go!

The fear of anger seeps into the home we once called our own,
where the children played and I was all your own.
I loved you for the man I knew
and not the man you really are.  

Mommy is a *****, you scream into the face of our child
who's trying to hide, not knowing what you've done.
Thump, thump,  pounding on the door
I open to see you were on your knees, crying on the floor.

We ran away into the dark
to hide from the vengeful mouth that fed upon my soul.
Lifeless am I, crying on the floor
I miss you but I can't take no more!
Angel Mar 2017
I will love myself today more than yesterday;
for the days of chaos before my calm
relished in my mind,
spinning crazy thoughts of suicide and hate.

Today is a new day, I say
I love myself in ways no man or woman can.
For the touch of my fingers sweeping across the bed
gives me life I never knew I had.
The smell of my perfume filling the air of my apartment
reminds me just how great a friend am I!
Brushing the strands of hair into the perfect shape
getting ready to lead the night into day.

Today is a new day to love again,
to remind myself that healing is forever.
I put my makeup on and sway my hips
to the sound of those gorgeous lips
singing "Today Your Love, Tomorrow the World"

I am beautiful
I am loved
I am worthy
I am enough.

— The End —