Look into my heart, and then my mind
and you will be as confused as I am.
2 tribal wars constantly fighting,
both knowing they're right.

My hearts tugging trying to show me whats best.
My minds screaming, forcing me to see sence.

Bullets shooting through my mind,
overwhelming me with confusion.
machetis slashing through my heart
causing me internal agony.

And through this all I smile, and laugh
be the happy child with no worries at all.

Who could guess whats under this smile?
See the tears that are constantly hidden?
Too afraid to come out
they will never be understood.

My heart is beating, but i am not alive.
Being alive is but a mere memory to me.

I cry, I feel pain, I hate no longer.
I laught, I feel joy, I love no longer.

For you cannot have one, without the other.
I am a corps, waisting through life.
Only existing.

I long to have these feelings back.
without these i am not human.
When i dream, I am alive.
I see him, I see us.

We live together till we're old.
We die together, everythings by his side.

But its too late for that now,
too late for me.
And so I go on, long after I should.
Existing.

When I wake, I come crashing back to reality,
and so sleep, is the only place i can live...

With the stars as my witnesses,
I shall enter eternal sleep.
Once again, a love wrecked life shall  
end the easy way out.

'o happy dagger ! this thy sheath,
there rust, and let me die.'

We havent had any food all day,
and my kids are resting in the hay.
with no money for a bed,
thats all they got to rest thier head.

I have to see the miller now,
how  I'll pay him i dont know how.
All i want is a loaf of bread,
just so i know that my children will be fed.

My husbands no-where to be seen,
no time to wonder where hes been.
I hope it doesn't end in caught,
the lord aint a man who wants to be faught.

At the end of the day,
i guess its ok.
and with a lack of food and a poor tum,
every-one seems to groan at mum.

Why do i always make mistakes?
When can i just get it right?
Why do i have to be tested?
When will i ever be trusted?
Why am i the strange outcast?
Where can i just fit in?
Why am i always the one to ask the questions?
When will i ever be told some answers?

Every night when I'm in bed
and all has gone to sleep
I close my eyes and think of dreams
then rest my sleepy head.

Then that night when no one sees
I fly off far away.
To meet my friends in the land of nod
untill the verry next day.

Palms sweaty
Legs weak
Fingers tremble
Feeling bleak

Eyes closed
Lungs tight
Can't breath
Won't fight

Heart racing
Completley hapless
Cold flashes
Eternal blackness

Side glances, worried eyes
Your so cute
Words of disguise
Are you ok?
Please wipe your eyes
Flippant speech
Don't wan't to impeach
Solemn stares
And hidden cares
Wait and Support
Don't want to be fought
Tactful words
That may not get through
Muttered through rosé
Long overdue