I found myself feeding lies to my own heart.
My mind knowing from the beginning that we were doomed from the start.
Not meant for each other but I feed the illusion in my mind, that we are destined to be part of each other’s life.
I feel this pain crawling all over my being, inhale, exhale, inhale, repeat, I’ll bear the pain, until we meet again.
Two flames that burned too bright, too fast; yet only one of us made it out alive.
My soul cries out for what was lost
May these wretched stars align and grant me my wish.
Forever and never, disregard me and lay me to rest.
Call me home, I’m tired of this. If we fell from grace, I’ll be the hell that you love and hate.
Forever and never my eternal love.
Part of me already knows that
The promises you make are empty
They bare no meaning
Yet I hold on to something
A sliver of hope
I turn away from the truth
The hope I feel is my own delusion
An illusion I create to save myself
Kept in the dark crevices of my mind
I throw myself deeper into the false pretense
and dig myself my own grave once more
Stuck in a reverie of my own, I let myself sink in own mind, pushing myself more into myself. I’m my own demise.
Take this with a grain of salt, if this makes you think of yourself by all means think of that. Just something I need to get out of my own system.
I’m meant to love you, to cherish you, but it
does not mean that I need you, I can live without you, I need you as a friend not a lover; perhaps my feelings will change with time but for now I keep you at arms length and let myself be free from the burden of romantic love and embrace with open arms our death.
Betrayed, that’s what I’ve felt for ions.
Were you nervous as I stared at your eyes.
Pathetic, your gaze waivers as you look somewhere else but my eyes.
Anger, the rage that has buildup for months gone.
Peace, peace before the storm.
A flicker of the old emotions hits me full force.
I hope that you are ready, youre going to regret every single decision that you’ve made against me.
Physical aches hurt my poor flesh, but this anger that consumes me will be your demise.
Run, run and don’t turn back.
I will be your bitter end.
to become happy you have to fake it till you make it
what satisfication will that ever give me?
how can one be fond of happiness if nothing seems to be right anymore in the place you call home
I’m going to destroy you
I’m going to watch you crumble
I’m going to watch you fall
I’ll be the hell you hate
I’ll become the thing you loath
I’ll be the thing that lurks at night
I’ll be your worst nightmare
I’ll be your enemy
I'll be anything you hate just to have your eyes on me
I think I fell in love once,
Since then I have not been able to love another.
Will I ever truly be able to fall in love again?
I do not know, perhaps I lack sympathy to love another.
Pity, I pity the one who decides to fall for me.
I cannot love another human, I don’t think I have ever loved a person truly.
I cannot love unless I love myself.
Don’t expect much from someone that cannot show affection.
My mind is the logical part of me
While my heart yearns for everything that it touches
Split those two apart and my mind will always win
Don’t cry over us, we never had a future.
To my first ‘love’ I hope you are doing well, this will never get to you. I hope you achieved your happiness. I don’t know where my happiness lays at. The only thing I know is that I’m doing ok.