I met you
In Savannah
At our grandparents military reunion.
You told me your name,
It was southern as a peach.
You were a good Christian girl,
And I wanted to cut in line at communion.

I’d never believed in “love at first sight”
That was for fairytales.
And I was far from being a knight.
But you felt like sunshine.
And you burned my cheeks,
When you grabbed my hand
And pulled me across the street.

Into a cramped art shop
Across from the restaurant,
Where our parents waited to be sat.
There were tons of paintings
Crammed in those walls,
But you, were the only thing,
Worth looking at.

You looked like a dandelion,
Blowing in the wind.
I wanted to bury my face
In the golden petals of your hair.
And forgot, I’m allergic to the pollen.

I bet your lips taste like nectar.
I bet you stole it from the Gods.
Because your lips looked soft as a honeysuckle
In full bloom.

Your smile,
Made me feel like a court jester.
I’d do anything to get a peak
At that toothy grin.
You made me feel full.
I never understood
How that could be a sin.

When we boarded the boat
I couldn’t eat,
My eyes wouldn’t focus on my plate.
My stomach was in knots,
Like the tattered laces on my feet.

It wasn’t sea sickness,
But I sure as hell
Wanted to bear witness
To the feeling in my bones.
I wanted to find where you were sitting.
I wanted to hold you up on the deck,
Like the Titanic.

But we all know how that ended.

That evening I found you by the railing,
You were watching the ripples in the lake.
Your eye glittered in the sunset,
Like a colony of lightning bugs.

I wanted to catch them in a mason jar,
I wanted them to light my bedroom
Like the stars

Even if it kept me awake.

When it was time to go home,
You gave me your number.
I was so eager
To type your name into my phone.

I wanted to write you everyday.
And I did.
And you replied everytime.
Until I wrote you
That I thought I might be gay.

You were nice about it at first.
But it was the kind of nice you show to a child,
When they ask you to play,
And you really don’t want to.

I brushed it off,
I didn’t want to assume the worst.
But you started texting back less,
I assumed you were busy.
But a day or two,
Turned into a week or two.

And then a month.
Two. Three.

I haven’t talked to you in years.

I can’t remember your name.

But I remember the way your fingers felt,
Intertwined in mine.
I remember wondering
If it was my palm sweating or yours,
Wondering if that was a sign.

I remember the way your hair smelled on the wind,
Sweet,
Like the tea.

We were only about thirteen,
But I was old enough to know
You were the sun shine,
And I needed the rain to start,
You need both to grow.

And you were the first girl

To ever,

Break my heart.